Amber rested her back against the wall, her body rigid. Tears welled up in her eyes that she struggled to hold back. Meanwhile, all the adrenaline Ruby felt after performing her latest masterpiece disintegrated. Even while Emilia showered her with praise, she couldn’t bring herself to enjoy it seeing how destroyed Amber was. “I’m really sorry, Amber, but I tried to explain…”
“It wasn’t supposed to be you! Scarlet, she…” Amber’s voice broke. Pressing both hands to her forehead, she turned her back and forced herself to breathe in an effort to calm down. “Now everything’s ruined. All my hard work. Just one time, I wanted my ideas to leave the lasting impression. But once again, you stole my spotlight!”
Her own euphoria finally wearing off, Emilia searched Vanessa’s face for reassurance, but only found exhaustion. With a sigh, Vanessa whispered, “I’ll be right back. Alejandro will be here soon for his routine congratulatory speech and he can’t be in the middle of this.”
Although taken aback by this turn of events, Emilia remained strong. “You’re right. Amber would never live it down.”
Vanessa quickly added, “Feel free to leave if it gets to be too much. Nobody would blame you.” She patted Emilia on the shoulder, “great job tonight,” and went through the curtain. Alejandro had already begun ascending the staircase leading up to the stage when she blocked his way. “I don’t think you want to come back here. Ruby and Amber are at it again.”
He let out a long groan, letting it all sink in before saying, “I should take care of it.”
“Really,” she tightened her grip on the handrails, “you should go. It would only make Amber more upset if you saw her like this.” Back by the bar, a cell phone began to ring and neither party seemed in a hurry to answer it.
From the sidelines, Emilia glanced back and forth at the feuding women as each spoke. On the off chance that she could help, she wanted to stay, but she was clearly out of her depth. Ruby crossed the room but kept her guard up. “I thought this was supposed to be a theme night. It’s about all of us. It’s Emilia’s first performance in a starring role.”
“Don’t you think I know that?” Amber gritted her teeth, trying to control her volume.
“Then why did you want Scarlet instead of me? Why did you have to get her alone to talk to her? To offer her the friendship she always wanted from you?” Unwilling to answer, Amber turned away.
The shuffling of heels broke through the silence. “Amber?” She met Emilia’s query, her ire slowly dissolving into embarrassment. “Vanessa said I could go if I want, but if you want me to stay…”
“No, it’s fine, Emilia. It’s probably better that you leave. Sorry if this ruined the night for you.”
“Don’t be. Tonight was so much fun. Nothing could ruin it for me.” They smiled at one another but knew full well it was a half-truth. “Good night, Ruby,” she tacked on as an afterthought on her way out the back door.
“Good night, Emilia,” she halfheartedly returned, her eyes still fixed on Amber.
Back at the staircase, Alejandro frowned, but gave in. “Are you sure you can handle this thing, Vanessa?”
“It wouldn’t be the first time,” Vanessa sighed, “or the last. I have to go. Besides, you should probably answer that call. It might be important.”
“Oh right, my uncles’ meetings conclude tonight…” He departed mid-sentence and took the important call into the office.
Vanessa sighed out of relief and disappeared behind the stage curtain. Not surprisingly, Emilia took her advice to leave and Amber hadn’t budged.
Ruby, meanwhile, had become more irate with impatience. Her voice cracked through her tears. “What'd I ever do to you to make you hate me so much?" Amber only responded by crossing her arms.
“Okay, that’s enough.” Vanessa positioned herself between them. “Look, we’ve all had a long night. It might be best to sleep on it and we’ll touch base in the morning.”
“Fine by me,” Amber muttered on her way through the curtain to take her bow. To her disappointment, the club was deserted. She’d gotten so caught up in everything with Ruby that the silence on the main floor hadn’t registered. Panicked, her eyes swept over the bar. Alejandro was nowhere to be found. She withdrew backstage. “Great, he’s gone too,” Amber grumbled under her breath, but Vanessa answered, “He left to take what might be an important call. Trust me, you don’t want Alejandro to see you like this.”
“You’re right.” Her shoulders went slack. “I just thought… this was my chance and I blew it.”
“What are you guys talking about? Is there something I’m missing here?” Ruby demanded, her arms hugging her ribs.
Amber stepped forward with a shrug. “You wanted answers? Fine. Tonight, I’m giving you some answers, but first, we need a change of venue.”
Saying no more, Amber led them back to Evangeline’s. Michel and Misha were counting their tips at the bar. Before they could say “sorry, we’re closed,” they recognized Amber and received her with open arms.
After exchanging pleasantries, she showed the girls to one of the empty tables and sat on her chair backwards. “Michel and Misha, we go way back.” They provided the drinks while Amber spent the better half of the night taking Ruby as far down memory lane as she had gone previously with Vanessa. There were a few remaining secrets she planned to hold onto. Ruby was attentive, nodding occasionally, but kept her poker face on the entire time. Once all was said and done, she took her leave without saying a single word.
* * *
“Excuse me.” Emilia’s heart skipped when she felt a tap on her shoulder. Her ears were still ringing from the fight; it snapped her back to reality. The culprit was a young man close to Alejandro’s age, but with more muscle tone in his upper body. His dark eyes were almost black. He seemed familiar somehow, but she couldn’t quite place him. “You were really great out there.”
“Thank you.” She blushed, nervously combing her hair behind her ears.
“How would you like to go for some coffee?”
“Sure.” Her body relaxed—the tension of the argument now a distant memory. They started down the street. Emilia prattled away absentmindedly, unable to contain her excitement. “Was there some place you had in mind? Because I’d been wanting to try this new cafe that just opened up around the corner from my apartment.”
After turning a couple corners, the man, who had trailed a few feet behind her, reached for her shoulder again. “Actually, I was thinking right here would be fine.” He spun her around, backing her against the alley wall, and kissed her. Automatically, her hands braced his arms. He leaned further into her mouth, his tongue wrestling with hers. A smoky whiskey smell lingered on his breath. She gasped, her arms wrapping around him as his lips grazed her neck.
“Hold on.” She dropped her arms when his hand started rubbing the inner part of her thigh. His arm wrapped around her back, pulling her body into his as his other hand slid under her panties. “Wait, I don’t think I like this…” He didn’t stop. In fact, a distinct murmur began building deep in his throat. “Stop!” She shoved him away.
The man’s chin stiffened as he ground his teeth. His pupils burned like furnace coals. “You know, it didn’t have to come to this. You could have just left me and Talia to our business. But because of your meddling, I lost my arrangement with Talia. And to top it all off, tonight, my family cut me out of their business because I’m only a liability to them.”
The air of familiarity from before suddenly made sense. The blurry image in her memory of Talia entangled with a guy that wasn’t her ex-boyfriend cleared up. “That was you? In that alley with her? Look, I’m sorry about that. I had no idea what I was walking in on.”
He shook his head. The sarcasm dripping from his lips made his voice raspier by the second. “That’s just too bad then, isn’t it? I don’t know about you, sweetheart, but I would like to finish what I started with her. All of you sirens are just sluts by trade anyway. It shouldn’t make that much of a difference, right?”
A combination of rage and acid built in her throat, but Emilia stood her ground. “That’s not true. I was never a part of any of this. I was just a back-up dancer until tonight.”
“Hmm…” His elevator eyes sized her up. “Judging from your reaction that night, I should have figured you were a virgin.” He braced the wall with his hand inches away from her. Hesitantly, her eyes met his. “You look good enough to eat.”
Before she could react, the man grabbed her wrists and forced her to the ground. Each hand pinned her arms down. She furiously kicked her legs, screaming, “Help! Someone, help me!” The sudden movement of his fists made her shut her eyes. The slaps and punches to her face, throat and torso stung more the louder she screamed. The gold ring on his right ring finger left an impression in the middle of her forehead, though not quite enough to draw blood. Her upper body struggled under his weight with little success. Finally, the pain got to be too much. Emilia found herself unable to move in spite of how much her mind urged her to.
Her attacker ignored this. He simply licked his lips and said, “I’ve never had virgin before.” The slow opening of a zipper pierced the air. Not far behind, an unrelated crescendo of footsteps thundered, arriving at a swift conclusion.
“Hold it right there, pig.” The familiar voice broke through the fogging of Emilia’s vision. Juan Paulo had a switchblade at the man’s neck. “Now back away, slowly.” He dug it in just enough that the edge of the knife drew a tiny stream of blood. Reluctantly, the man obeyed. “Straighten yourself out. Now, when I release you, you had better run like hell in the opposite direction. Or God willing, I will kill you right here.” Juan Paulo removed his knife and supplied an encouraging shove. Emilia’s attacker didn’t pause for even a second as he made a hurried escape.
Emilia loudly gasped. Her body spasmed before collapsing into itself. Juan Paulo got on his knees, coming immediately to her side. “Emilia! Oh my… what did that monster do to you?” She only managed a whimper. He helped her sit up and wrapped his jacket around her shoulders.
“No! Let me go!” She pushed against him before he took her into his arms.
“Emilia, it’s ok. It’s me. It’s Juan Paulo.” He reached forward, parting her bangs to have a look at the impression. His stomach turned, but he held himself together. Tears streaked down her shivering cheeks. Milliseconds after the light of recognition rekindled in her eyes, her entire body seized up and she passed out in his arms.
* * *
“Talia! Vanessa! Anybody, open up!” Juan Paulo battered the door. “I’m here with Emilia! She’s been hurt!”
Having regained some color in her face, Scarlet answered the door. Even if she wasn’t under the weather, Emilia’s bruises and shaking alone would have turned her stomach. She gasped, “Emilia! Come in.” She supported his shoulder while bringing the door to a swift close. “You can put her in Vanessa’s bed for the time being.” He did as he was told, adding the blankets Scarlet handed him. The mascara she applied earlier in the evening, before she cancelled her plans to perform, smudged her eyes and her sight. Swallowing hard to ease the shaking in her voice, “Talia, you need to get in here…”
The other bedroom door slammed against the wall within seconds of opening. Talia’s knees quaked, her hand over her mouth, but there was no hesitation. There were only tears as she shakily stroked Emilia’s cheek. “My Emilia…” Her bangs covered her shut eyes, but the angst was unmistakable.
Even Juan Paulo, who stepped back into the hallway, had to fight to hold back the hysterics to tell his tale. “I heard her screaming as I was returning home for the night. Pulling a knife on the creep was enough motivation to make him get lost.”
Scarlet left the room for a box of tissues and to find her phone. She handled it to Talia. “Here, use this number. This doctor helped me years ago and I still keep in contact with him.” She took it into the other room where she’d be out of earshot. Scarlet wiped her eyes and sniffed back the snot building in her nose. “Ruby helped me… leave home after a really horrible night… when I came here, the brothers sent that doctor to examine me. Our father… he did a lot of damage… but that time when he raped me, he knocked me up… weeks later, I lost the baby.” She broke into sobs. Juan Paulo rubbed her back to offer reassurance, but she quickly recovered. She shook her head, speaking with almost an air of irony, “All these years later, even though it was conceived out of malice, I still haven’t forgiven myself. But sometimes when I need to talk, Dr. Rodriguez makes time to see me.”
Talia returned briefly. “He’s on his way. I’m going outside to wait for him.”
Dr. Rodriguez materialized five minutes later. He and Scarlet regarded one another, exchanging glances of respect, before he disappeared into the room with Talia.
The screaming started the moment she revived. “Get off me! Don’t touch me!”
“Emilia!” Talia braced her shoulders. “It’s all right. It’s all right, you’re here with us now.”
Amidst her panting, she looked up at her. “Talia?”
“That’s right. That’s right, I’m here.” She securely wrapped an arm around her back, moving it up and down in a soothing motion.
The screams had dissolved into sobs when Alejandro came through the front door. Scarlet received him while blocking his way. “It’s not a good time, Alejandro. Talia’s in there with a doctor looking at Emilia. JP brought her here after someone attacked her.”
“Jesus…” Dumbstruck, he sank onto the sofa cushion next to Juan Paulo without noticing him there. He shook his head, staring into space. “Everything got so heated with Ruby and Amber. Vanessa insisted she could handle the situation and I received a call with some important news…. It’s my fault… I should have been there to walk her home.”
“They’re fighting again?!” Scarlet exclaimed, but quickly covered her mouth and swallowed back the liquid building in her throat.
“Are you okay?”
She nodded, clearing her throat. “I’m fine for now… None of this would have happened if I didn’t pick tonight to get sick.”
“Nobody planned for any of this to happen, Scarlet,” Juan Paulo said. “The only thing we can do is hope I got there in time before any real damage was done.”
She inhaled deeply, but the give in her stomach prevailed. “Excuse me…” Scarlet dashed into the bathroom, swinging the door closed behind her.
* * *
The moment Dr. Rodriguez reentered the sitting room, Juan Paulo and Alejandro leapt to their feet. He switched his medical bag to the opposite hand and calmly waved his right hand in a downward motion. His neat mustache crinkled with a reassuring smile. “Emilia will be fine. I gave her a sedative so she can get some rest. Hopefully that will aid with her mental recovery from this ordeal.” Both returned his smile but upon sitting back down, their postures resumed their previous state though with less foot tapping and tension in their backs.
Noting the empty space between them, the doctor inquired, “where’s Scarlet? I was hoping to discuss something with her before I take my leave.” The guys both pointed toward the shut bathroom door. Rapping on the door with his knuckles, he asked, “Scarlet?” Retching and gasping responded. He tried again, “Scarlet, is everything all right in there?”
“Yeah,” she mumbled, following her response with a flush. “Come in.” She sat on the closed lid, her knees facing inward. Looking up, she asked, “Could you shut the door?”
“Of course,” he obeyed. After handing her a handkerchief, he knelt in front of her.
“Thank you.” She wiped her mouth and bent over her knees. “This stomach bug has been killing me all day.”
“May I?” He tilted her chin upwards and felt around her throat. “You look a little pale. How long has this been going on?”
“Since this morning. It was really bad this morning. I’d been on saltines and ginger ale all day, but it was only a temporary fix.”
“You looked fine a moment ago. I imagine these events have you a little rattled, given your history.”
Suddenly remembering, Scarlet gasped, “Oh Emilia, how is she?”
“It’s hard to say. Physically, everything is fine aside from the cut and bruises. The young man arrived before any internal damage could be done.”
“Oh thank god…” Her shoulders sank. “She’s innocent. None of us ever wanted her to suffer like we have.”
He nodded, but the furrow remained in his forehead. “So, what about you? It’s been some time since our last talk. Have there been any changes? Good or bad? Besides this ‘bug’?”
She bit her lip. “I know I didn’t check in for our regular appointment this year. It’s just that… I didn’t feel like I needed it this time.” The smile proved futile to hold back at this point. “I met someone. Javier was such a sweet guy. Strong, but patient. And so kind.”
“I don’t mean to pry, but I couldn’t help noticing you mentioned him in past tense.”
“It’s complicated.” Her hands clenched together on her lap. “The nightmares came back. It was the first time I’d had sex since… I left home. I explained it to him, and he was so understanding... tonight was the first time I saw him in a month, but I guess I’m still not ready to...”
Dr. Rodriguez laid a hand on her shoulder. “You have nothing to be ashamed of, Scarlet. Few would be able to understand the horror you went through.”
“The sex was amazing too… it was spontaneous and romantic… Rehearsing for this show came with a lot of nerves, but it was a good distraction from everything.” She stared at the wall, her smile blissful, “It was so perfect too. Something I’d been wanting to express for a really long time. But I guess I’m still not ready for that first solo moment.” Her composure dissolved upon seeing Dr. Rodriguez’s concern. “What? What is it?”
He removed his glasses. “How long has this sickness been going on?”
“I don’t know. As much as I want to blame it on nerves, things have felt different the past three, maybe four days. What are you thinking?”
“Is it possible that this could be morning sickness?
Scarlet gasped, immediately covering her mouth, muffling her “oh my god” exclamation. Then when she removed it, she beamed. “That would explain a lot.” Each attempt to say any more led to a fit of nervous giggles.
Satisfied, Dr. Rodriguez replaced his glasses and stood. “If anything else turns up, for you or Emilia, don’t hesitate to give me a call. It was good seeing you again, Scarlet. Take care.” Alone with her thoughts, Scarlet rubbed her arms to erase the remaining goosebumps.
* * *
Talia came part of the way out of the room. “Juan Paulo?” He stood up just as quickly as he had earlier when the doctor left. “Emilia wants to see you before the drugs finish putting her to sleep.”
“Sure, ok…” Despite Dr. Rodriguez’s reassurances, his entire body tensed up and slowed the pace of his stride considerably. He glimpsed Emilia and the shuddering of his heart compelled him to hold the archway for support. Her cheeks had bleached with scattered black and blue splotches. Where Rodrigo’s ring had cut into her forehead, a bandage now concealed it.
“Oh, Emilia…” he gasped, lost for words.
Her closed eyes scrunched, her hoarse voice asked, “JP?” With difficulty, she opened her eyes and immediately tried to sit up.
“Hang on.” He rushed over and knelt by the bed, pushing her down gently enough for her to get the idea. One hand held hers while the other stroked the top of her head. Her breathing had slowed, but the pulse present under Juan Paulo’s grip was still very quick. “Doctor’s orders, you should be resting.”
“I know,” she sighed. Her bright blue eyes flickered occasionally with anxiety, but they slowly grew heavy with drowsiness.
“So he says you’re going to be ok.”
“Yeah…” She struggled to meet his eye but succeeded in adding the most crucial detail. “You stopped him… he didn’t get a chance to…”
“Thank goodness…” Because he was caught up in the moment, Juan Paulo didn’t realize his voice broke with that statement. Emilia and Talia did; they shared a glance and conflicting emotions emerged in both of them. “I’ll just let you rest then. Do you need anything else before I go?”
“You saved me… No, I’ll be fine here. Thank you.” Finally, after a healthy exhale, Emilia drifted off to sleep. Juan Paulo swallowed back the lump in his throat, leaning over to kiss Emilia on the top of her head, before returning to his feet. Talia met him there, her eyebrows askew. He answered the anticipated question before she could speak it. “I forget who said Emilia is like a little sister to all of you. I guess that company now includes me.”
He had his hand on the doorknob when she added, “Juan Paulo, I…” She ground her teeth, pausing for a moment before the right words came to her. “Thanks from me as well. For saving her life.”
“Well, you know me, Talia. Always trying to be the hero.”
Scarlet was the last to see him leave, during which she noticed something peculiar. His steady breath was somewhat jagged and every few steps, he took a brief moment to regain his balance. But what took her aback the most— his far-off stare burning a hole in the door, as if he’d seen a ghost. She couldn’t put her finger on it but something in her gut told her there was more on his mind than the scene he was leaving behind.
* * *
“Talia?” Alejandro lightly tapped on the door frame outside the second bedroom. “May I sit with you?” She nodded. Her hand absentmindedly combed through Emilia’s hair as she slept. “How is she doing?”
“A little better...” She wiped her eyes quickly.
“Did she get a good look at the guy?”
“That’s what makes this hard. That indentation on her forehead? That’s from a ring I gave Rodrigo ages ago. I took him in the alley the night I broke it off with Juan Paulo. Emilia saw us. This was his revenge for her interrupting.”
“You know, I always said Rodrigo was no good. He was always too eager when you gave him ‘the call’.”
“Yes, I remember you telling me that several times. I was never the best listener.” She shook her head. “Juan Paulo was so good to me when we were together. All I could think about these past couple weeks… how I refused to listen to him when he said I was meant for better than this. This life that I live.”
“You really like him, huh? I see the way you look at him. Something was different about you, a good different, when you were seeing him.”
“You always think you know me so well… but this time, Alejandro, I must admit you are right.” She hung her head. “He was never like any of the other guys I’d been with. I was afraid that maybe he wanted to change me, but… he only wanted me to be the best version of myself.” Emilia gasped, prompting Talia’s posture to stiffen, but she simply rolled over in her sleep. “So what brought you here so late, Alejandro?”
“My uncles contacted me tonight about the results of their negotiations. Rodrigo is cut out of his family’s business. I came in part to warn you and the others, but it seems I was too late. I just have to tell them what happened and they will see to it that he’s handled.”
Resigned, Talia nodded. “Whatever punishment is carried out, I need to be there. So I can be sure he will never hurt anyone again.”
Alejandro’s memory flickered back to Amber’s own altercation with Rodrigo and decided to redirect the conversation to a more pressing matter. “I was also planning on reporting to you about Amber’s theme night. Everyone involved was amazing. Emilia handled herself especially well… before everything else happened. Before Amber and Ruby got into that fight.”
“Amber…” She groaned. “What was the problem this time?”
“She worked really hard on this project with the other girls. She just didn’t count on Ruby coming in Scarlet’s place and that the crowd would be chanting her name instead.” He quickly added, “Amber did her best routine in many years. She looked like she brought herself to the stage. Not hiding behind another character.”
“She’s probably so consumed by this irritating vendetta of hers that she has no idea Emilia left.” Her knuckles bleached at her sides. “Such recklessness. I cannot overlook this behavior in favor of her talents. Not anymore.”
“Wait a minute, Talia.” A month ago, she wouldn’t listen to anything that came out of his mouth. But because she was being unusually receptive, Alejandro was determined to make his voice heard. “I’ve been watching her in rehearsal. She’s been very good to Emilia. She’d certainly taken her thoughts and ideas into account. Something you failed to do the one time she pitched you a routine.”
“Hurry up and make your point,” she grumbled.
“This was just an unfortunate accident. A temporary lapse in judgement that could happen to any of us. Amber isn’t all bad. She just feels misunderstood and wants us to see the person she is. On her own terms.”
“Well then,” she paused as she assessed his new attitude, “if she’s really as good a person as I’m led to believe you think she is…” She coyly flashed her eyes at him. He swallowed with no choice but to nod and agree. “…she will accept the responsibility if the wrong person is blamed for her actions.”
“But who?” Before he could formulate a list of possibilities, he met the eyes boring into his forehead. “Really?”
***
The title of this chapter is a reference to a song that plays a major role in a later performance.
Like with several of the chapters, I'd written most of this years ago and spent the last 2 years touching things up, making connections to other story points and so on. Alejandro's comment "you really like him, huh" was one of the earliest sparks of a story I had and it was a long time before I figured out how to get there.
I'm not sure if I was working on this chapter at the time but when I was listening to "Eyes Wide Open" by Ashlee Simpson a couple years ago, the scene with Emilia played in my head like a movie. So vivid it was scary- the song ended and I'd be gasping for air. The only bit of trivia I found about it online was her saying in an interview how it was about her fear of having a ghost in her house.
Don't know why but I always interpeted it as #MeToo statement long before any hashtags existed. Being a survivor of assault and recognizing that someone else in your day-to-day life had gone through it. They're still in the denial phase of their grief and you're at a loss about how to help them.
Again, I want to stress that none of this is autobiographical. But the way I put myself in the shoes of my characters, it certainly feels that way. Especially in editing.
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