The only reason I watch Adult Swim anymore is to keep up with Bleach... within the year, even that part of my routine will be gone.
College was the first time I gave that block of animation on Cartoon Network a chance. I discovered Inuyasha along with FullMetal Alchemist (both series), Kekkaishi and Bleach...
Every now and then when I watch on Saturday night, they'll show clips of the various shows featured on the block. Whenever I see any image of Inuyasha, something inside me always reacts.
I still very much adore him and hope to find the strength and decisiveness to revamp my fanfiction turned original work inspired by him into something I can publish.
Sadly, that's a time that just seems too far away. Like Jonas, never seeing the light of day beyond my laptop. It's a combination of not having the will power and the brain power to keep going. Finding the pieces I need to fix to make it one more marketable and the other more my own creation.
When it comes to my sources of inspiration over the years, I tend to fall in love pretty easily. Within a few episodes, chapters or whatever, I know I'm in for the long haul.
Inuyasha took a little while longer. Of course, I enjoyed the storyline, that good old conflict between good and evil, the colorful cast and enchantment of the world.
But I didn't get that gut feeling until some time later. I'm not sure which episode set it off... usually I can pinpoint these things more precisely.
More or less, I found him particularly fascinating/interesting because he's not your typical leading man. Heck, he's more an anti-hero than a hero... earlier in the series, he could be seen a bad guy, but not the most devious by any means.
Up until that point, my male protagonists have been straight-forward or they have an air of mystery to them.
Inuyasha has that air of mystery too, but unlike the other guys, you had to get to know him before finding he was good deep down. I guess you could call that the "tough-guy archetype," acting tough to cover up emotional insecurities. Not an entirely new concept by any means, but the first time I fell for that archetype in a romantic sense.
Not that I see myself getting in that position in real life :-P
Somehow, it's just important to me that I explore that fully in my work in some capacity.
Romance, to me, is self-sacrifice, putting another's happiness and well-being over your own. Being there for another person through the good and bad. Helping them find themselves whether or not they know they're lost. Bringing out the best in them.
Jonas's story had quite a bit of the self-sacrifice in it as well. Nina wanted to do it for Jonas and Jonas wanted to do it because he wanted his world to be rid of evil... because as the reincarnation of an angel, it's in his makeup.
My Inuyasha fanfiction gave me the chance to do the same thing... but with my character who sacrifices herself for his happiness, since his existence saved her life.
And to top it all off, his safeguards came down in her passing. Their own relationship was kinda about that too. He saw her as an equal. She tested his patience on a number of occasions and he realized things about himself he never knew.
Well, that last part is always in my work... love allows the characters who'd otherwise been alone to flourish, to see themselves as more than how they'd been and love leads to them becoming better people.
At least all those things USED to be in my work... but for my peace of mind, I'll have these notes down for safe keeping when I feel I'm ready to return.
It's funny... I have this distinct idea of what I feel romance is... yet I've never been truly in love.