I have a list of over 60 songs that went on to inspire various scenes in the story. A handful of them, you could say, make me feel like a proud parent as they represent pivotal moments in these characters’ lives. When they finally rise to the occasion to reclaim their narrative and overcome whatever obstacles that had been holding them back.
Amber’s song later became “You & I” by Lady Gaga, where
she’s finally able to show the crowd and Alejandro who she really is on stage.
Then of course, Talia and JP having their reconciliation duet
with “My heart is Open” by Maroon 5 feat. Gwen Stefani.
That song is already powerful on its own… I mean, it is a Sia song with her
complete bag of tricks and emotions. But I swear, if this book becomes a Broadway
show or a movie, I want to be in the crowd when they start cheering as Talia’s
happy ending finally comes together.
Vanessa’s moment of triumph was referenced in Chapter 10, where
the climax of her birthday showcase was set to “Cinderella” by Britney Spears.
But because it predated the events of the story, this is all the reader is able
to glimpse of it. Which is a bit of a shame because it’s such a cool moment.
So I decided while re-reading my notes today; I want to
share the full story. Which will ultimately be me just copying my notes straight
from my notebook. I didn’t date everything but it looks to be one of my earlier
ideas, using that particular Britney song in this fashion, because the date listed
after the initial installment was 2014 and I started writing this whole book in
2012.
I have two versions of the narrative. While I can’t say for
sure if I remembered I had already written it once, I’m happy enough with the
end result to include both versions.
And also, these are written almost word for word except for
a few grammatical errors here and there. So excuse how good/bad the actual
writing this. This is essentially first draft material.
Version 1
Talia was returning from a
liquor run when she ran into a familiar face.
“Vanessa, is that you?”
When she caught her eye, she
quickly turned away but responded. “Talia? I can’t believe it. It’s been such a
long time.” Although her voice was upbeat, Talia saw through the façade immediately.
“Vanessa, what is it? Why won’t
you meet my eye?” She turned Vanessa toward her with a touch of her hand. With
her other, she removed the hand Vanessa used to shield her face. She gasped at
the black eye and how her bangs were in extreme disarray. “Oh my…” Talia
scrambled to get her words, the right ones, in order. “Who has done this to
you?”
“It’s nothing. Really.”
Talia crossed her arms and gave
her the hardest stare she could manage. “How long has this been going on?” When
she didn’t reply, Talia grabbed her wrist. “Fine. We won’t talk here so I will
take you to a place where you can talk. Hold these.” She handed her the bag
with bottles of rum and tequila before pulling her in the direction of the
club. They handed the booze to Alejandro before sitting down in the empty
manager’s office.
“Ok, start talking and don’t sugarcoat
this.”
Vanessa collapsed in sobs between
her hands, but her words remained intelligible. “My parents sent me off to
college, but I didn’t want the career they wanted for me. a steady paycheck, a doctor
or lawyer, better than they ever had. I started taking dance classes but couldn’t
afford the full cost of lessons. My boyfriend started helping me out and I decided
to stop school once I had enough experience to become a teacher myself. Then he
changed. He got possessive and wanted me to stop partners’ Latin dancing
because it made him jealous. That’s when the beatings started. A couple times,
it got so bad I ran away but I had nowhere else to go. He knows this, but when I
came back, he’s sorry and has something new that he bought me. The make-up sex
wasn’t bad either.”
“Did he ever force you to…”
“No,” she quickly responded. “But
when his eyes raged when he beat me crumbled up on the floor, I know he’s thinking
it. Maybe this time is when he will…”
Talia slammed her hands on the
desk. “No! There will not be another time. Not if I have anything to say about
it.”
“All my clothes and belongings
are there. I can’t just leave. And what if he comes here looking for me?”
“All right, but I’m not
letting you go there alone.” She reached for the rotary phone and started
dialing. “The brothers helped a couple friends of mine in the past. They’ll
help us fix this.”
***
The brothers came as back-up,
but Vanessa returned with Talia to her loft to gather her belongings. Every
outfit she got while working at the dance studio and taking classes, her music
collection and, despite Talia’s objections of having anything her boyfriend gave
her, the lingerie and negligees that served as peace offerings. “He knows I can’t
resist a good set of lingerie. Sometimes it makes me feel sexier than dancing
the lambada.”
Just then, they heard a scuffle
outside. Trash cans fell over and doors slammed. Three sets of footsteps followed.
The brothers must have thrown him through the door. The amount of force made
any balance impossible.
“Richie… you’re early. I didn’t
think you’d be back until late.”
“I couldn’t stop thinking
about before, so I came home to make it up to you.” He brushed himself off and
assessed the room with a hint of macho sarcasm. “What’s going on, Vanessa? What’s
with the heavies? Are you going somewhere?”
Talia came in between them,
holding her ground. “Can you blame her, honestly blame her, Richie?”
“Who is this?” His voice cracked
with anger.
“Never mind who I am. Nobody treats
my friend the way you have. I’m getting her out of here. We’ll do it by force
if we have to.”
“Yeah, I see that.” He looked
around her to Vanessa. “Baby, after all I did so you can do your dancing… this
is it?” He handed her the bag. She gasped when she looked inside. “It’s gorgeous.
You really do have good taste.”
Talia snatched it up. “Vanessa,
you can’t seriously be considering staying. For this.”
“No, I’m going. But I really
should model it for Richie before I go.”
***
Vanessa went
into her old bedroom to change, but through the thin walls, Talia heard her
make a number of calls to girlfriends. One by one, they came streaming into the
loft. The last one held a boombox. When they come out, all eight were wearing
lingerie. Vanessa came to the front wearing a valentine red negligee. She
winked at Talia. “Thanks, Tal. I think I’ll take it from here. We spent months preparing
for this and I needed that extra push to go through with it… hit it!” The boombox
then started playing. “Get him in the chair, girls.”
A blonde and brunette grabbed
Richie by each elbow and sat him down in one of the kitchen table chairs. While
mouthing the lyrics, Vanessa gave him what appeared to be a lap dance.
Something she’d clearly done for him several times before. Then without warning
at the end of the second line, she slapped him hard across the face. The blonde
and brunette stood on each side of her as they danced a few feet in front of
him. They swayed back and forth, shifting weight from one foot to another in rhythm
to the music. Their elbows stayed together, parallel to their chest until they smacked
the sides of their closed fists together as if to say ‘we’re breaking your
balls for this.’ One by one, the girls picked up one of the Vanessa’s packed
bags to take with them to the brothers’ club. She kept performing to Richie,
dashing backwards on her way out the door. “Ciao, my love, and good riddance.”
Talia delayed her stunned
expression enough to develop her own message. “If you try to hurt her again,
you’ll have my people to answer to.” Talia raced to keep up with the girls who
were gallivanting through the streets, practically waking up the whole
neighborhood. The lights came on one by one and people ran to their balconies and
windows. Somehow, though, they were cheering instead of complaining.
They found their way back to
the club. Vanessa must have given them the address over the phone. When she
caught up to them inside, they’d taken over the entire floor. All the chairs and
tables were moved out of the way. The steps grew more advanced as time went on.
Every part of their body had a part to play. It had the magnitude of a Britney
Spears music video and Talia had trouble keeping her jaw off the floor. The choreography
was concise, likely the results of months of practice.
Scarlet arrived a few moments
later. “Is that Vanessa?”
“It is. It took
a little convincing to get her going but when she does, she always packs a
wallop.”
“Do you
think she could teach us to move like that?” Their eyes never strayed from
Vanessa’s “break-up” routine but they agreed this was what the club needed. ”With
your cha-cha, my belly dancing and the training Vanessa has, I think we have
something fantastic on our hands.”
…
Takeaways:
·
The narrative changes between versions whether
Richie was a high school boyfriend or a college sweetheart. I’m honestly not
sure which I prefer. I do like the idea that he supported her dancing when her parents
didn’t think it was a suitable career choice. But I’m also not sure whether it
suits her character to be practical like her parents or to have a rebellious
streak thanks to Richie. All I know for sure is that her career as a dance teacher
is something he winds up not approving.
·
A number of times in the main story, Vanessa says
how Talia helped her get out of this bad situation. So it would make sense for
Talia to be more instrumental in her leaving him. A little more than simply her
confronting Vanessa about leaving and she just agrees like that.
·
This is also a bit of a reminder I need to write
somewhere in the story about how giving dance lessons is a popular job in the
heat of tourism season. And how maybe some of the top students wound up taking
over teaching when Vanessa left for Calypso. It seems to be an ongoing cycle
where top students wind up becoming teachers when the current teacher leaves
for a better opportunity elsewhere.
…
Version 2
[starts with a series of bullet points where I’m working
things out before a narrative starts coming together. Focusing on Vanessa and
Richie’s history together]
·
They knew each other in high school, but he was
2 grades ahead of her
·
They met sometime after Talia stops coming into
school and he fills in that void as her friend. Then it gets serious after he
graduates.
·
It’s a Romeo and Juliet situation where her
parents don’t want them involved because a relationship would get in the way of
making a solid career for herself. And he works odd jobs as a mechanic and in construction
and not enough money. They think she’ll meet someone more suitable in college. She’s
very serious about him because she isn’t super close with anyone else
·
She decides to drop out her senior year and
move in with him and they [her parents] cut her off completely and she never
reaches out to them again. (They may/may not have arranged a relationship and
she’s not into their choice for her…)
·
She comes across a dance studio when she goes to
move in with him and remembers how she took lessons during the summer. Before her
parents pushed her in the direction of a more stable career. And it has a
Wanted sign for “instructor- will train”. She’s so talented, this transition to
instructor happens quickly.
·
A lot of his construction jobs fall short of
completion because the money runs out a lot of the time. (This may explain why
Amber’s side of town- The Underground- is underdeveloped). But his lack of sufficient
work leaves him frustrated and he takes some of this out on Vanessa. It also
gets to a point where she’s the only one bringing in money and he worries she’ll
find someone else and leave him. So he does everything he can to keep her from seeing
other guys. He orders her not to have any male students and gets into the habit
of walking her home so she’s unable to have a life outside of it. The others
ask her questions when bruises start showing up and they put the pieces
together on their own. She’s also afraid to go back to her parents and ask for
help, thinking they wouldn’t take her back. And she also doesn’t want to admit
they were right
·
Talia meets Vanessa when she’s out on her lunch
break. It’s a day when he has an interview so she’s able to get away for a
little while. It’s somewhere in the area with some cafes and food joints where
the food trucks inevitably take over. They get to talking for a few minutes but
she panics she’s running late and Talia insists on coming with her. She goes
into the back to freshen up. Talia asks if anyone knows anything and they tell
her about how possessive Richie has gotten.
“I
want to help set things right, but I’ll need everyone’s help.” Vanessa comes
back and gathers they’d talked.
“It’s
fine. I don’t need anyone’s help. I got myself into this and I need to find my
own way out.”
Talia
crosses her arms. “The Vanessa I knew in school would have already left then.
This cannot go on anymore. I don’t want my old friend to lose more than her dignity.”
“Dignity?
What would you know about dignity? You left school and didn’t come back and I didn’t
know what happened to you. Real friends tell each other everything. Even the
hard stuff.”
Talia
winced for a moment and took another few seconds to collect herself. “You don’t
want to hear about the skeletons in my closet.” She put her arm behind her back
and rubbed the crux of her elbow with her other hand.
“Ok. Not
everything but if you tell me one secret, I’ll let you help me.”
Talia
swallowed and nodded. “You have yourself a deal. After your class, I’ll tell
you about it on the way back to your place.” She then proceeded to the stereo. “But
first, a special lesson for your class if you don’t mind.”
“Sure,
not at all.” Vanessa turns to the others. “Talia was taught belly dance from a
young age. Nobody is better than her.”
“Hmm… I’ve
picked up a few tricks since the last time we saw me.” She ran through the CD sleeves
until she found the one she wanted. “Perfect…”
Without
further comment, she got in the middle of the studio floor and the others gave
her room. Her movements were subtle to start to fit the music. The slightest curve
to her hips as they swayed. The occasional flicker of her wrist. Just enough eye
contact to draw their interest. Then momentum started to increase. She straightened
her posture and moved her cha-cha hips backwards but on each barrage of claps,
she held her hands up for flamenco response. Then on the chorus, she held her
skirt in line with her waist and sauntered forward. But all the flirtation was
in her eyes, eyelashes and smile. The bridge featured her specialty, creating
waves that ran through her core but her attention appeared to be on another planet
or galaxy. Vanessa shook her head, astonished. She didn’t know where Talia pictured
herself in that moment but she exuded so much happiness she was almost jealous.
She
finished and the room erupted with applause. Outside, a small crowd of spectators
had also gathered and showed their appreciation. A sly smile creeped across her
face and she stepped outside for a moment to accept compliments and let them
know there’d be more that to come when Calypso had its grand opening in the
coming weeks.
Vanessa
hadn’t caught any of this- she was still overcoming her astonishment. The students
chattered amongst themselves and she picked up a few phrases among the drone. Compliments
for Talia. Wanting to see more from her. Others hoping Vanessa would take her
offer and that this convinced her.
Talia
came in, blush coating her cheeks but her eyes were all business. “So, what do
you think?”
Vanessa
exhaled, “Wow... the way you blended the different styles together so
effortlessly. And how much of the performance was about subtle eye contact and
facial expressions.”
“It
comes with experience. But that wasn’t what I meant. Will you come with me? We
go back to your place, you pack one bag and we leave. And if your loser of a
boyfriend tries to stop us, well, let’s just say I have friends that can help
us.”
Vanessa
looked around and nearly all of her students nodded or urged her “do it.”
Finally, she rolled her eyes. “Ok, I’ll get my things. Just one moment.”
In the
moments she was in the back room, Talia told the others to collaborate on a
routine and to meet them at the big building at the end of the main drag. “Alejandro
will let you in. Say you’re with me and there should be no problem.” Vanessa
came back but before they walked out, she added. “Now it’s your turn.”
Vanessa
led the way but the first several minutes were quiet. She turned back to look
at Talia. Her eyes shifted from one side of the street to the other as if on edge.
“Talia, you promised… come on…” She softened her tone progressively, “if it’s
too much, start small. What happened that made you leave school?”
As
solid as her gaze had been, vulnerability broken through her tough façade. “Do
you remember my telling you my mother remarried?”
“Yeah-
you liked the guy but you had reservations.”
“Well,
I left because my boyfriend cheated on me and that bastard had me convinced no
man would be good enough for me. He offered to homeschool me, but also seduced
me into bed with him. On multiple occasions.” Vanessa gasped, covering her
mouth. “He was generous and kind. At the end, he was only using me. He stole from
my new employers the same way he stole from me. My mother left when she found out
about us. And he took my virtue and everything my mother saved up for me. The
least I could do was give the brothers a new proposition to earn their money
back from the product he stole. That’s where Calypso comes in.”
“What’s
that?”
“It
was a restaurant the brothers gave their nephew Alejandro to run. But business
is bad right now. Something new and exciting needs to draw in new customers. One
of the waitresses agreed to help me and it would be great to have you as a
third.”
In the
time that passed, Talia’s countenance did a complete 180. She was defeated and uncomfortable
about relaying her secret. But once Calypso came into the picture, everything
about her sparkled and Vanessa found her offer impossible to resist. It felt
like a dream that made her float into the sky. Then they arrived at her apartment
and her stomach crashed to the ground.
Talia
patted her shoulder. “Don’t worry. This all ends tonight. Go in and get
everything ready. I have a few calls to make.” After Vanessa let herself in,
Talia hung outside the door and dialed into her new cell phone. The island didn’t
have great cell service yet, but through the brothers’ connections, she was
better off than most. She rang the club and Alejandro picked up on the first
ring.
“Calypso-
where the drinks are cold and the entertainment is hot.”
She
rolled her eyes. “Really, Alejandro? Is that the best you can do?”
“Talia…”
he gasped and grabbed the edge of the counter to steady himself. “What’s going
on? There’s a dozen women here that tell me you sent them.”
“Did
you let them in?”
“Yes,
of course I let them in. They’d been hard at work. But what’s the plan here? We’re
not due to open for another week.”
“Quit
worrying yourself. This is something special just for tonight. I’m helping out
an old friend who’s in a bit of trouble.”
“Ok,
well, be careful.”
“You just
make sure our visitors have everything they need. If all goes to plan, we should
arrive in the next half hour.” She hung up before he could respond and called the
brothers to lend some backup in case Vanessa’s boyfriend proved difficult to
deal with.
Talia
entered Vanessa’s bedroom and immediately paused to take inventory. It looked
like her closet and wardrobe exploded. Dresses and skirts were strewn all over
the floor and her bed. She sighed, “Ok, first off, you only need your finest
clothes. We need to make a good impression.”
“I
know but some are perfect for cha-cha, others for samba. Not to mention my tons
of lingerie.”
She cocked
an eyebrow. “Lingerie? How much?” She opened the chest and found rows of them
neatly pressed and folded.
“Richie
knows they’re my weakness so when we fight like this, he always comes back with
a new set. But most of these I bought myself.”
“Here’s
what I’d do. two of each main color, one lace, one plain. If you have your
favorites, bring those… but nothing that loser gave you. No reminders of any of
this.”
“Ok, I’ll
be another few minutes.”
Talia
check her phone and found a text saying back up was on the way. Vanessa came
out with two bags after another five minutes passed. Talia quickly ushered two
large bald men into the kitchen so they could spring the trap whenever needed.
After
getting a quick look at them, Vanessa panicked. “Maybe we should forget this
whole thing. Richie was good to me when my parents kicked me out. He believed in
my dream when they refused to see the potential in it.”
“Vanessa,”
Talia grabbed her shoulders. “Listen to me. All of that may be true but from
what you said to me earlier, that part of him is not making the rules anymore. This
man controls you and hurts you when you won’t do exactly what he says. You are
not this damsel in distress. You are a queen and the ruler of your own destiny.
Have faith in yourself.”
Another
knock came at the door. Some of Vanessa’s students were on the other side. “Hey,
what are you doing here?”
She
looked to Talia who shrugged. “It would seem I am not alone in thinking this was
a good idea.”
“Exactly!
We’re not letting you back out now. You offered to teach us for free until we
could get the funds to pay you back. Now it is our turn to help you.”
“Ok,
ok, you’re right! All of you. Now wait in the bedroom… I have a plan and we’re
going to leave here in style.”
As
soon as they shut themselves inside, Richie burst through the door with a
shopping bag in hand. “Baby, I got the job…” he spoke, his eyes shining with
joy until he looked around. Both Vanessa and Talia had their arms crossed and
the two bouncers emerged from the kitchen, cracking their knuckles. “Vanessa,
what’s going on here? What’s with the heavies?” More swiftly than their physiques
would have you believe, they grabbed him by the shoulders and threw him in a
chair, tying his hands behind his back. “I come back to apologize and this is
the thanks I get?”
He
struggled to get loose but the ropes were too tight. Vanessa pointed to the bag
he dropped on the floor in the scuffle. “Is this for me?”
“Yeah…
it’s lace and leather, just the way you like it. Now have these goons untie me and
we can work this out.” She lifted the black frock up and stroked the fabric.
“It’s
gorgeous. Much softer than it looks.” Her stiff posture gradually softened and
Talia hissed, “Vanessa… don’t think what you’re thinking. You need to come with
me and leave all of this behind.”
“Shut
up, bitch! This doesn’t concern you!”
The
bouncer on his left stomped on his foot, yielding a scream. “Show Ms. Talia respect.”
“I
have to try this on. Be right back.” Talia chased after her but short of closing
the bedroom door, she winked, “I know exactly how to play this.”
Hushed
voices hatched a plan behind closed doors. Talia divided her attention between
it and Richie, who sulked, staring at the ground. She shook her head. “Men like
you disgust me. You think we are just property to you. A prize to show off. But
guess what—we are stronger and more capable than you give us credit for.”
He
scoffed, “Hmph. You don’t know how Vanessa is around lingerie. Just wait. She’ll
come busting out here to give me a lap dance while the rest of you can only
watch.”
Before
Talia could ask her bodyguards to act, the door burst open with music blasting.
One of the dancers had a boombox playing a song from the same album Talia danced
to only an hour ago. The other girl followed with Vanessa right behind. All
three were clad in camisoles, fishnets and stiletto boots. Vanessa approached Richie,
stopping short of sitting on his lap. His smugness quickly gave way to
confusion. She flipped her hair in his face, placing her hands on his shoulders.
She caressed them for a moment but then grabbed his forehead and shoved it back
with her palm. After stepping back to fall in line with the others, their movements
were as tight as a pop performance on a music award show with plenty of sass
and attitude. Then at the height of the chorus, Vanessa slapped Richie so hard
across the face, she almost knocked over the chair holding him captive.
The sound of it was so jarring, all of the
other girls jumped. They crowded around the stereo and turned it off. Vanessa
beamed, “Ok girls, each of you grab a bag. We’re out of here!” The girls
cheered and rushed out the door.
Talia
cocked an eyebrow back at Richie and told the two bouncers, “you two know what to
do. Make sure he’s unrecognizable by the time you’re done with him.”
“What?
No… Vanessa! Baby, after everything I did for you and your dream, you can’t
just leave me here with these…” Before he could utter another atrocity, he got
punched in the ribs from both sides.
With
one hand on the door frame, Vanessa let out one last sigh for the good old
days. “Sorry, Richie, but this Cinderella is out of here.”
The
hooting and hollering continued as the girls skipped down the street. As they
drew closer to their destination, the cheering got louder. More of Vanessa’s
students appeared on either side of the street, applauding ravenously.
Vanessa
did a double take. “Talia- did you do this?”
“It
was only appropriate. Not all girls are able to leave their abusers in the dust
so a victory lap was in order.” Calypso came into view at the end of the street.
Vanessa’s jaw dropped. The large brick building looked imposing but as she took
in the view for a few minutes, the warmth in her heart told her she was finally
home.
Talia patted
her on the shoulder. “After you… hit it!” Like that, music started blasting
from inside the building. “Alejandro says that sound system had needed an
update forever. I admit he did a good job restoring it.” This comment she kept
to herself, though.
“What’s
that?”
“Come
on.” Talia nudged her forward to push the door open.
“Whoa…”
The same
song from before was playing but at the final bridge. Across the massive dance
floor in the middle of the room in four rows of five, her students danced the
same choreography she’d worked on for months but with some alterations of their
own. She marveled at them as she walked to the front of the room but when she
recognized the final chorus was about to begin, she rushed to the stage and
immediately started her own steps. Her smile grew so big it nearly blinded the
whole room.
Talia could
only stand back and admire the sight. Scarlet emerged from the storeroom behind
the bar and came to Talia’s side to admire the view. “So that’s Vanessa? She did
it?”
“Yeah,
she did. And now we can finally begin our master plan to save Calypso.”
…
Takeaways:
·
Really enjoyed revisiting the guys’ dialogue. Talia
might say otherwise but sometimes I think Alejandro could be the best character
in the book
·
Re-reading all this, I couldn’t help thinking: man,
I love this version of Talia. In the book, she’s cynical and moody and not that
fun to be around. But she’s definitely the type of girl you don’t want to mess
with when she has an axe to grind and you happen to be a dude
Maybe someday I'll find a way to mesh these two together and have a full comprehensie flashback. But for now, this will have to do.
