Apparently, today is one of those days where I get uber paranoid, terrified, frustrated and angry all at once... as if the rest of the world isn't already so goddam negative, all that bad energy is getting to me.
Let's be clear: I'd only read the first "50 Shades" book and I saw the movie twice. First in theaters and second after getting it on DVD. The movie was much better than the book. For someone like me who gets sensitive around a lot of sexuality, it was a relief that the movie only had 4 major sex scenes. And yes, that does kinda scream to the school of "this genre is probably not for you"... but forgive me for wanting to stretch my boundaries every now and then.
As a writer... I will concede that the book was badly written... but the attacks that really caused this Twitter trending event to go off the rails came from all the critics of the "50 Shades" series and the author didn't answer any of those concerns.
Concerns that she not only misrepresented BDSM as rape culture but also condoned domestic abuse and perpetuated that "it's okay because Christian Grey is rich." I'd heard many of these concerns before and reading the first book, I understood them.
It's written from Anastasia Steele's POV, so I see and feel everything she feels. I felt the sexual liberation when she lost her virginity and I did feel the heat in the sex scenes. One caveat I had was that it was just too damn repetitive and too damn often that they [excuse me] fucked in this book. But seriously, how often can you write sex scenes and keep the reader engaged without it getting repetitive?
What I REALLY felt reading the book... her low points where she felt used by Christian, the moments where it felt like he really didn't have a heart...
The movie treatment gave Anastasia Steele more positive qualities. Granted, the second time I saw the movie, her pleading with Christian for this relationship to be NORMAL... it got a little repetitive too. But I liked that she was taking initiative about things.
***
I did have a point to all this....I just got a little lost in rehashing all these details.
We all have our fears as writers. The most prevalent is not getting published and all this hard work being for nothing.
One I have frequently is that people will say my writing is terrible. That my characters are two-dimensional. One of my own fanfics [based on one of my favorite animé series] that I transformed into original fiction... a couple of my commenters said the writing was terrible and my protagonist was a "Mary Sue"... which is writer's slang for BORING.
People have used the same phrase to describe Bella Swan.
Which is yet another issue I had with #AskELJames... I know "50 Shades" was originally "Twilight" fanfiction... but I never saw Bella and Edward's relationship as an abusive one. The only real negatives I saw was the stalking and the beginning of "Eclipse" where he wouldn't let her see Jacob.
...how I feel about Jacob Black is another topic all to its own... but the short version: I liked him in "Twilight" and "New Moon" (up until he became a werewolf and nearly led Edward to commit suicide... HATED him through most of "Eclipse" and that hate continued until the 2nd half of "Breaking Dawn" after he finally got over Bella.
Yeah, I'm VERY Team Edward and Jacob spent the majority of the series annoying the hell out of me.
Admittedly, in the movie version of "Eclipse," I was incensed that Edward wouldn't let Bella see Jacob by unattaching her car battery... but all the feels I had for Jacob when they finally got time together blew up when he said he'd rather Bella was dead than become a vampire.... I don't care what the circumstances are, you do not tell someone you care about "I rather you were dead"...
Kristen Stewart's portrayal of Bella, I have my nitpicks about... but I've lived and breathed her while reading the books. I know she's better than a lot of people give her credit for.
***
And again, I'm side-tracked a bit.
I'm afraid I'll never get published. I'm afraid nobody will like my stories. That they're called "bad writing".
One fear with this particular story I'm writing... well, it's warranted, but it's also unavoidable.
When you write about sex and selling yourself for sex, there'll always be critics. No matter how much I rationalize that there are few other options for these girls, people are going to disagree.
I just hope people don't draw negative conclusion about ME by reading the books.
That I'm making light of these situations to further my writing career, that I don't take it seriously...
My characters are by no means perfect. I just hope I don't wind up making Talia and Amber too unlikeable.
Right now, the criticism I could draw about Amber is that she goes too far to achieve her goal. That being a bitch doesn't justify her feelings about things. And also that the other characters shouldn't be willing to automatically forgive her after she explains her motives... Talia is the only one who takes a while to come around. And likewise, it takes a lot for Amber to accept Talia's motives.
Amber wasn't just Talia's antithesis, but she also answers a lot of criticisms Talia may get from readers.
Initially her grand explanation for EVERYTHING is that her stepfather persuaded her to have sex with him and she fell in love with him and her sleeping around with strangers for money is her way of getting back at him.
Amber doesn't buy into it, especially because Talia's experiences were the result of childhood naivety. Whereas many of the other characters actually experienced abuse and Talia's business of using dance to flaunt sexuality is equivalent, in Amber's view, to portraying yourself as a piece of meat for consumers to drool over. As if all the horrors some of them endured meant nothing to her.
Again, what I aim to do with my story is to get faces to girls that have gone through this type of abuse and show how they can use it to fuel their actions to help them channel that negative energy and therefore heal.
Monday, June 29, 2015
Saturday, June 20, 2015
Protecting My Girls/Female Cast [Te Busque]
Much like my previous entry about Vanity/Apollonia 6, this began as a Facebook status and I decided it was better suited for a blog discussion.
Only in this case, I didn't even begin a Facebook status because I had this bad feeling that I'd be editing it for half an hour before I came to this conclusion.
The idea for this started when I read a couple things in the paper this morning. The first was about the notion of a registry for strippers and people who work in the adult entertainment industry.
http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2015/jun/19/bill-to-create-state-stripper-registry-may-see-hou/
Here's a version of it online for those who are interested.
It does bring up some good points, I will grant it that. Trafficking is an important issue that needs to be cracked down upon.
But the notion of putting these girls on a registry if they want to be the business... what's to say that isn't going to come back to bite them when they move on other industries that are less... what's the word... controversial?
Granted, some will have to declare it in interviews when they have to give their employment histories, but others want to move past it and deny they had to lower themselves to that business because nothing else was working out for them?
Maybe I'm not giving businesses enough credit here, but to me, I feel like that'd be a red flag they wouldn't be willing to work around.
For as long as I am working on this story and writing this novel, I'm probably always going to be looking at storylines in TV and movies and headlines in newspapers and thinking about my girls, my characters... as characters, I have them pretty much hashed out and developed in my head (as well as in various notebooks I'd been keeping). But some of these things probably be used for inspiration and might become elements in my story (in small and large capacities).
It's kinda funny because I'd been nowhere near this industry personally- yet I'd become so close to my girls that I feel protective of them. They don't even exist beyond my notebooks, Word documents and this blog, yet I feel I need to defend them from the stigma that comes from the adult entertainment industry.
Let's get one thing straight, though: my girls aren't strippers.
They are dancers that work at a nightclub. Ultimately what goes on is that they open at night for a number of hours. A lot of young people come to drink (the bar is the only fixture that remains of the original establishment- a restaurant in a degrading neighborhood that was losing money). There is dance music pumping through the speakers. But through the course of the night, the dancers come out to perform elaborate numbers.
I refer to them as "sirens" because they are a) gorgeous, b) the star attraction that draws the crowds- but unlike the sirens in "The Odyssey" they don't create shipwrecks, c) experts at what they do... which happens to be Latin dancing and entertaining.
Another interesting thing that appeared in the paper today- there was a poll asking how many people were in favor of prostitution and against it... the divide was pretty even- 45% for 55% against.
We're here thinking they aren't quite the same thing. But I had to point out that they're different parts of the adult entertainment industry.
I don't know how I'd feel about it being legal in the U.S.... I feel like it might change the aesthetic of the country. Not to mention it'd probably allow for more people to take advantage of the populous and sex trafficking would become an even greater problem than it already is.
What I know for sure is that where my story is set, prostitution is legal.
It's a small fraction of the operation I've constructed, but nonetheless, it is a point of contention.
This is a poor neighborhood, so really, the only source of income involves sex, drugs and tourism. If not one of the big cities like Rio De Janeiro, it's a small town on the outskirts of a big city like Rio. And tourists visiting the area might have heard about these legendary drop-dead gorgeous dancers and that's what generates business... a 4-5 star restaurant might not have the same effect.
I'd hashed out another "mythology" for my setting that does involve prostitution. It's a dodgy part of town I refer to as the Underground... and there, people specialize BDSM.
"50 Shades of Grey" helped a little bit with my creating this facet of the story. Even if it's just a small part of it, it's something else that adds to the motivation of one of my characters.
At this junction of the story- which is really the only junction I care about since it's the part of it making it into the main novel- only three of the sirens are involved in the prostitution side of things.
Ruby's motivation is money-motivated. The rent for lofts and apartments is really high, probably because the money is needed to restore the neighborhood, but with some corruption, it's probably just filling the pockets of politicians. Plus she does it so her twin sister Scarlet doesn't have to. Their experiences growing up with their abusive father had such a negative impact on Scarlet that she doesn't have the confidence to take a lead role in any of the performances (at best she's on stage with her sister and their "gimmick" is dressing and dancing as mirror images of each other). And as I'd recently realized, she hadn't any sexual experience since she was able to get away from him.
Amber's motivation is money-motivated as well, but for reasons other than rent costs. Whatever extra money she has left over after rent, it goes to two of her friends who are saving up to buy another establishment- which happens to be located in the Underground side of town. She also wants to use it as a place to put on her own performances: which don't just involve Latin dancing, but also other genres like hip-hop.
Her affiliations with BDSM, which she became an expert in while living in the Underground for the past 5 years, also helped her secure a position there.
And she also does it, believing Talia would never take her seriously if she was just a dancer.
The addition of the prostitution layer of the business was Talia's idea and it was what sold her on becoming a partner in the club ownership. But her motivation for it is more on the self-serving side of things than it is monetarily. Granted, the money she procured for the mob bosses that owned the place helped pay outstanding rent and utilities and it also goes on to pay for costumes, stage designs and so on.
But she's also a bit of a sex addict :shrug: it doesn't help that in her teenage years, she was told repeatedly by someone she trusted and cared about that sex is the only way to make money in this town.
Sadly, that is true for a lot of people in underdeveloped countries like the ones in South America... there are few opportunities to make a living and most are bound there by the sheer fact they can't afford to migrate to another country that has more to offer.
I honestly don't know why I suddenly took it upon myself to get on this soapbox.
This story all started with the idea of bringing some of my favorite songs to life in a visual capacity.
And originally it was going to be about a girl in the prostitution industry who ends up falling in love with someone she meets at random and her boss(es) wind up having to let her go.
I guess I also wanted to explore the stereotype- that girls who involve themselves in the adult entertainment business come from less than desirable backgrounds. They were either poor, grew up around the industry, were sexually abused, etc.
And I ultimately wanted to say that they are real people and shouldn't necessarily be taken for granted.
But also my greatest motivation: I've never really written a female centric story before. All of my work have involved love stories. Guy meets girls. They fall in love. A lot of shit happens and they either become stronger as a result or someone dies at the end.
Granted, there are some love stories involved here and that is part of the story. But the majority of it is about friendship among women, exploring different parts of yourselves and discovering you had strength that you didn't know was possible.
Only in this case, I didn't even begin a Facebook status because I had this bad feeling that I'd be editing it for half an hour before I came to this conclusion.
The idea for this started when I read a couple things in the paper this morning. The first was about the notion of a registry for strippers and people who work in the adult entertainment industry.
http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2015/jun/19/bill-to-create-state-stripper-registry-may-see-hou/
Here's a version of it online for those who are interested.
It does bring up some good points, I will grant it that. Trafficking is an important issue that needs to be cracked down upon.
But the notion of putting these girls on a registry if they want to be the business... what's to say that isn't going to come back to bite them when they move on other industries that are less... what's the word... controversial?
Granted, some will have to declare it in interviews when they have to give their employment histories, but others want to move past it and deny they had to lower themselves to that business because nothing else was working out for them?
Maybe I'm not giving businesses enough credit here, but to me, I feel like that'd be a red flag they wouldn't be willing to work around.
For as long as I am working on this story and writing this novel, I'm probably always going to be looking at storylines in TV and movies and headlines in newspapers and thinking about my girls, my characters... as characters, I have them pretty much hashed out and developed in my head (as well as in various notebooks I'd been keeping). But some of these things probably be used for inspiration and might become elements in my story (in small and large capacities).
It's kinda funny because I'd been nowhere near this industry personally- yet I'd become so close to my girls that I feel protective of them. They don't even exist beyond my notebooks, Word documents and this blog, yet I feel I need to defend them from the stigma that comes from the adult entertainment industry.
Let's get one thing straight, though: my girls aren't strippers.
They are dancers that work at a nightclub. Ultimately what goes on is that they open at night for a number of hours. A lot of young people come to drink (the bar is the only fixture that remains of the original establishment- a restaurant in a degrading neighborhood that was losing money). There is dance music pumping through the speakers. But through the course of the night, the dancers come out to perform elaborate numbers.
I refer to them as "sirens" because they are a) gorgeous, b) the star attraction that draws the crowds- but unlike the sirens in "The Odyssey" they don't create shipwrecks, c) experts at what they do... which happens to be Latin dancing and entertaining.
Another interesting thing that appeared in the paper today- there was a poll asking how many people were in favor of prostitution and against it... the divide was pretty even- 45% for 55% against.
We're here thinking they aren't quite the same thing. But I had to point out that they're different parts of the adult entertainment industry.
I don't know how I'd feel about it being legal in the U.S.... I feel like it might change the aesthetic of the country. Not to mention it'd probably allow for more people to take advantage of the populous and sex trafficking would become an even greater problem than it already is.
What I know for sure is that where my story is set, prostitution is legal.
It's a small fraction of the operation I've constructed, but nonetheless, it is a point of contention.
This is a poor neighborhood, so really, the only source of income involves sex, drugs and tourism. If not one of the big cities like Rio De Janeiro, it's a small town on the outskirts of a big city like Rio. And tourists visiting the area might have heard about these legendary drop-dead gorgeous dancers and that's what generates business... a 4-5 star restaurant might not have the same effect.
I'd hashed out another "mythology" for my setting that does involve prostitution. It's a dodgy part of town I refer to as the Underground... and there, people specialize BDSM.
"50 Shades of Grey" helped a little bit with my creating this facet of the story. Even if it's just a small part of it, it's something else that adds to the motivation of one of my characters.
At this junction of the story- which is really the only junction I care about since it's the part of it making it into the main novel- only three of the sirens are involved in the prostitution side of things.
Ruby's motivation is money-motivated. The rent for lofts and apartments is really high, probably because the money is needed to restore the neighborhood, but with some corruption, it's probably just filling the pockets of politicians. Plus she does it so her twin sister Scarlet doesn't have to. Their experiences growing up with their abusive father had such a negative impact on Scarlet that she doesn't have the confidence to take a lead role in any of the performances (at best she's on stage with her sister and their "gimmick" is dressing and dancing as mirror images of each other). And as I'd recently realized, she hadn't any sexual experience since she was able to get away from him.
Amber's motivation is money-motivated as well, but for reasons other than rent costs. Whatever extra money she has left over after rent, it goes to two of her friends who are saving up to buy another establishment- which happens to be located in the Underground side of town. She also wants to use it as a place to put on her own performances: which don't just involve Latin dancing, but also other genres like hip-hop.
Her affiliations with BDSM, which she became an expert in while living in the Underground for the past 5 years, also helped her secure a position there.
And she also does it, believing Talia would never take her seriously if she was just a dancer.
The addition of the prostitution layer of the business was Talia's idea and it was what sold her on becoming a partner in the club ownership. But her motivation for it is more on the self-serving side of things than it is monetarily. Granted, the money she procured for the mob bosses that owned the place helped pay outstanding rent and utilities and it also goes on to pay for costumes, stage designs and so on.
But she's also a bit of a sex addict :shrug: it doesn't help that in her teenage years, she was told repeatedly by someone she trusted and cared about that sex is the only way to make money in this town.
Sadly, that is true for a lot of people in underdeveloped countries like the ones in South America... there are few opportunities to make a living and most are bound there by the sheer fact they can't afford to migrate to another country that has more to offer.
I honestly don't know why I suddenly took it upon myself to get on this soapbox.
This story all started with the idea of bringing some of my favorite songs to life in a visual capacity.
And originally it was going to be about a girl in the prostitution industry who ends up falling in love with someone she meets at random and her boss(es) wind up having to let her go.
I guess I also wanted to explore the stereotype- that girls who involve themselves in the adult entertainment business come from less than desirable backgrounds. They were either poor, grew up around the industry, were sexually abused, etc.
And I ultimately wanted to say that they are real people and shouldn't necessarily be taken for granted.
But also my greatest motivation: I've never really written a female centric story before. All of my work have involved love stories. Guy meets girls. They fall in love. A lot of shit happens and they either become stronger as a result or someone dies at the end.
Granted, there are some love stories involved here and that is part of the story. But the majority of it is about friendship among women, exploring different parts of yourselves and discovering you had strength that you didn't know was possible.
Sunday, June 14, 2015
Vanity/Apollonia 6- Te Busque inspiration
I'm not sure how many times I mentioned how Apollonia 6's lone single "Sex Shooter" was the "activating incident" for this story I'd been writing since 2012... but I'll say it again.
As a HUGE fan of Prince's music and his movie "Purple Rain," I'd put together a playlist of all the music from the movie. Most are songs from the albums, but longer versions. Others are B-sides and outtakes that he'd set aside for the movie, but never made it to the soundtrack.
I believe that particular afternoon, I was listening to another outtake [that later got revamped for Jill Jones's debut album] called "G-Spot" and followed it up with "Sex Shooter"... it didn't just bring me back to the scene in the movie, but gears started turning in my head.
Maybe "Te Busque" was simply my way of resurrecting the "Vanity" look in another time and place with a completely different story...
but this one song gave me an idea I'd been chasing ever since. And also helped me realize ideas I'd been gathering when I had Nelly Furtado's "Loose" album on heavy rotation.
My story has evolved IMMENSELY since then. But the one thing that remains is that these girls are dancers, they flaunt their sexuality in musical numbers, and some of them offer sexual favors to close business deals for their bosses- who happen to work in the drug trade. [Taking that into account, maybe this should take place in Columbia instead of Brazil... but I have plenty of time to figure that out].
The one difference in my version of this cliché- the latter part of the job is something that some of the girls do of their own free will [not all of them participate in this]. They aren't hookers who were forced into the sex trade. It's maybe a little cliché that all of them had less than perfect childhoods and it helped contribute to this. But there's also the fact that there are few options to make a living in this poor town.
Vanity 6 featured three girls dressed in leather boots, heels and lingerie. On stage, their prerogative was to bring sexual fantasies alive with their dancing and their music. Listening to their album, they have songs like "Nasty Girl" and "Wet Dream"... really risqué stuff... I mean, these songs were written by the same guy who wrote "Darling Nikki."
Not all of the songs on my inspirational playlists are nearly that risqué, but I find their stage presence very inspiring. They're confident with their bodies and flaunting their sexuality. All part of the female empowerment motif I'm going for.
I watched some concert footage that I downloaded for inspiration the way I'd used a bunch of music videos and my playlists...
it made me wish I could dance like that :P I promise, it'd just be for research. Another way to get into my characters' heads.
The "Vanity" look suits Amber so well and not unlike Vanity herself [shocking considering how AMAZING she looked while performing], she's not entirely comfortable with this way of performing.
I could totally see her having a similar look and stage presence.
As a HUGE fan of Prince's music and his movie "Purple Rain," I'd put together a playlist of all the music from the movie. Most are songs from the albums, but longer versions. Others are B-sides and outtakes that he'd set aside for the movie, but never made it to the soundtrack.
I believe that particular afternoon, I was listening to another outtake [that later got revamped for Jill Jones's debut album] called "G-Spot" and followed it up with "Sex Shooter"... it didn't just bring me back to the scene in the movie, but gears started turning in my head.
Maybe "Te Busque" was simply my way of resurrecting the "Vanity" look in another time and place with a completely different story...
but this one song gave me an idea I'd been chasing ever since. And also helped me realize ideas I'd been gathering when I had Nelly Furtado's "Loose" album on heavy rotation.
My story has evolved IMMENSELY since then. But the one thing that remains is that these girls are dancers, they flaunt their sexuality in musical numbers, and some of them offer sexual favors to close business deals for their bosses- who happen to work in the drug trade. [Taking that into account, maybe this should take place in Columbia instead of Brazil... but I have plenty of time to figure that out].
The one difference in my version of this cliché- the latter part of the job is something that some of the girls do of their own free will [not all of them participate in this]. They aren't hookers who were forced into the sex trade. It's maybe a little cliché that all of them had less than perfect childhoods and it helped contribute to this. But there's also the fact that there are few options to make a living in this poor town.
Vanity 6 featured three girls dressed in leather boots, heels and lingerie. On stage, their prerogative was to bring sexual fantasies alive with their dancing and their music. Listening to their album, they have songs like "Nasty Girl" and "Wet Dream"... really risqué stuff... I mean, these songs were written by the same guy who wrote "Darling Nikki."
Not all of the songs on my inspirational playlists are nearly that risqué, but I find their stage presence very inspiring. They're confident with their bodies and flaunting their sexuality. All part of the female empowerment motif I'm going for.
I watched some concert footage that I downloaded for inspiration the way I'd used a bunch of music videos and my playlists...
it made me wish I could dance like that :P I promise, it'd just be for research. Another way to get into my characters' heads.
The "Vanity" look suits Amber so well and not unlike Vanity herself [shocking considering how AMAZING she looked while performing], she's not entirely comfortable with this way of performing.
I could totally see her having a similar look and stage presence.
Tuesday, June 9, 2015
Why Amber's a "Ladykiller" who has "Tickets" to her own show [Te Busque]
The words in quotes are the titles of Maroon 5 tracks.
Whether or not they will make it into the actual story, I'm still trying to figure out.
It's strange- the vast majority of the music that's inspiring my story are all by female artists. Maybe because Talia has this attitude about hating men... I still think about how funny it was that I spent so much time with these female influences (a bunch of personal role models), I fall in love with another male celebrity [this time an athlete] and have zero recollection of the last time I felt that way about a guy.
That kinda dispels any doubt in my head that I'm straight. I may be a little bicurious at times, but I definitely feel that attractive pull more strongly towards guys.
Anyway...
The first time I heard "Ladykiller" while running through Maroon 5's Overexposed album, I was perplexed as much as I was awed.
Because to me, it sounds like Adam's warning an ex-girlfriend to stay away from another woman. In reality, that more likely isn't true... maybe I was just looking for something more spicy..
Then when I started putting "Tickets" on heavy rotation, the visual brainstorming really started kicking into high gear. I see Amber dancing with her two guy friends, Michel and Misha. The three of them are on a stage doing a lot of cha-cha and samba steps. She's being flirtatious as usual. This time around, I started picturing choreography with her arms, folding them and twisting them in different positions in front of her.
Both songs, I see coming into play in one particular pivotal scene.
The set-up:
Talia had just broken up with Juan Paulo, the guy who spent most of the 2nd act (of three) wooing her. And they'd only been together for a couple weeks. An argument ensues, he says some things that he doesn't mean, but she takes very seriously and breaks up with him over them.
Emilia overhears the argument... her apartment happens to be located on the street they happen to be walking... she goes after Talia reason with her, only to find her already making out with another guy. One of many "booty call" guys she has saved on her cell phone when she needs a quick fix.
After the guy storms off upon the interruption, Emilia is beside herself. Talia deliberately kept this part of her and their business from her to protect her innocence. In this instance, Emilia proclaims that she's going to work with Amber instead- since she'd made it clear that she wants to work with her. Talia tries to talk her out of it, saying that Amber takes the business too seriously and she couldn't handle it. Emilia insists that nothing could be worse than Talia shacking up with a random guy not even 10 minutes after breaking up with a perfectly nice guy.
I started brainstorming a bit more while running through "Ladykiller" earlier today and I came across an interesting notion:
I never took into account what the other S&M prostitutes thought of Amber- particularly after she left their side of town and Evangeline and her girlfriend wound up dead. Isaac owned their business and may have told them that Amber turned Evangeline into a lesbian- which led to her murder.
Having said that, "Ladykiller" might take on a literal meaning.
I'd also played around with the idea that Amber was so hardcore as a part of Talia's business that some of the back-up dancers quit because they couldn't handle her way of doing things.
I'm still not entirely sure about going that route.
Supposing my book ever got finished/published and turned into a movie, this could be an interesting number where Emilia wonders through the dingy side of town. Although this city is very poor to begin with, this is the poorest part of it. [For whatever reason, I'm picturing an early scene from "Rock of Ages" where a bunch of local prostitutes harass Sherrie, singing "you were meant for this since you were born"]
The only way Emilia can find out where Amber works her 2nd job is either a conversation with Vanessa or Ruby.
Maybe she calls Scarlet/Ruby's apartment. It's not too late in the evening, so Scarlet is probably still with Javier (they're either having sex at this point or had just finished).
Ruby answers. Emilia asks where she can find Amber because she needs to talk to her. Ruby goes down a few floors, knocks on Amber's door, but she doesn't answer. She then calls Vanessa, asking her the same question.
In a previous scene that I'm still brainstorming about, Vanessa and Amber have another conversation. Amber had just started materializing her idea for a theme night and if Talia agrees to it, she wants Vanessa to be a part of it. She tells her that she really needs this to work out, not just to make a mark at the club, but she needs the extra money for Michel and Misha's business. She relays that she tries to help them out whenever she can and she performs with them some nights.
After hanging up with Vanessa, she calls Emilia back to forward the address. But she still tries to warn her about her. Emilia rolls her eyes, insisting she can handle her being extra hardcore about the business. Ruby still insists that she be careful. Saying how she'd blown up at her several times and doesn't like spending time with the other girls. "Just don't be surprised if she ends up breaking your heart. At the end of the day, she's the only one she really cares about."
Despite what just happened with Talia, how she spent the past year or so looking up to her only to have that image in her head smashed, Emilia remains optimistic. She truly believes Amber is different and wants to really get to know her since the other girls have clearly given up on that.
"Tickets" could very well be an inside joke. Amber dancing to this music because that's how others perceive her. They believe she's only concerned about herself and could care less about the people she hurts along the way.
However, this winds up not being the case. Amber is very warm with Emilia, looking very forward to working with her, while on the inside she's rejoicing because she knew there'd come a time that Emilia would tire of following Talia's lead [ergo the song "Told ya so" by Karmin].
All this being said, I have a couple of scenes to work on.
*Vanessa and Amber- "I have an idea and I want you to be part of it. And I hope Emilia will be too."
*Conversation with Amber and Talia- "You'll see. There will come a time when Emilia tries of following your lead and wants to join me."
*phone conversation involving Emilia, Ruby and Vanessa
*Emilia walking to the gritty side of town, taking in the surroundings, asking the local girls where the place is located and they tell her to watch out for Amber because she got one of their friends killed [and later, the conversation needs to happen where this is clarified]
*Amber's performance with Michel and Misha shortly before Emilia shows up.
Whether or not they will make it into the actual story, I'm still trying to figure out.
It's strange- the vast majority of the music that's inspiring my story are all by female artists. Maybe because Talia has this attitude about hating men... I still think about how funny it was that I spent so much time with these female influences (a bunch of personal role models), I fall in love with another male celebrity [this time an athlete] and have zero recollection of the last time I felt that way about a guy.
That kinda dispels any doubt in my head that I'm straight. I may be a little bicurious at times, but I definitely feel that attractive pull more strongly towards guys.
Anyway...
The first time I heard "Ladykiller" while running through Maroon 5's Overexposed album, I was perplexed as much as I was awed.
Because to me, it sounds like Adam's warning an ex-girlfriend to stay away from another woman. In reality, that more likely isn't true... maybe I was just looking for something more spicy..
Then when I started putting "Tickets" on heavy rotation, the visual brainstorming really started kicking into high gear. I see Amber dancing with her two guy friends, Michel and Misha. The three of them are on a stage doing a lot of cha-cha and samba steps. She's being flirtatious as usual. This time around, I started picturing choreography with her arms, folding them and twisting them in different positions in front of her.
Both songs, I see coming into play in one particular pivotal scene.
The set-up:
Talia had just broken up with Juan Paulo, the guy who spent most of the 2nd act (of three) wooing her. And they'd only been together for a couple weeks. An argument ensues, he says some things that he doesn't mean, but she takes very seriously and breaks up with him over them.
Emilia overhears the argument... her apartment happens to be located on the street they happen to be walking... she goes after Talia reason with her, only to find her already making out with another guy. One of many "booty call" guys she has saved on her cell phone when she needs a quick fix.
After the guy storms off upon the interruption, Emilia is beside herself. Talia deliberately kept this part of her and their business from her to protect her innocence. In this instance, Emilia proclaims that she's going to work with Amber instead- since she'd made it clear that she wants to work with her. Talia tries to talk her out of it, saying that Amber takes the business too seriously and she couldn't handle it. Emilia insists that nothing could be worse than Talia shacking up with a random guy not even 10 minutes after breaking up with a perfectly nice guy.
I started brainstorming a bit more while running through "Ladykiller" earlier today and I came across an interesting notion:
I never took into account what the other S&M prostitutes thought of Amber- particularly after she left their side of town and Evangeline and her girlfriend wound up dead. Isaac owned their business and may have told them that Amber turned Evangeline into a lesbian- which led to her murder.
Having said that, "Ladykiller" might take on a literal meaning.
I'd also played around with the idea that Amber was so hardcore as a part of Talia's business that some of the back-up dancers quit because they couldn't handle her way of doing things.
I'm still not entirely sure about going that route.
Supposing my book ever got finished/published and turned into a movie, this could be an interesting number where Emilia wonders through the dingy side of town. Although this city is very poor to begin with, this is the poorest part of it. [For whatever reason, I'm picturing an early scene from "Rock of Ages" where a bunch of local prostitutes harass Sherrie, singing "you were meant for this since you were born"]
The only way Emilia can find out where Amber works her 2nd job is either a conversation with Vanessa or Ruby.
Maybe she calls Scarlet/Ruby's apartment. It's not too late in the evening, so Scarlet is probably still with Javier (they're either having sex at this point or had just finished).
Ruby answers. Emilia asks where she can find Amber because she needs to talk to her. Ruby goes down a few floors, knocks on Amber's door, but she doesn't answer. She then calls Vanessa, asking her the same question.
In a previous scene that I'm still brainstorming about, Vanessa and Amber have another conversation. Amber had just started materializing her idea for a theme night and if Talia agrees to it, she wants Vanessa to be a part of it. She tells her that she really needs this to work out, not just to make a mark at the club, but she needs the extra money for Michel and Misha's business. She relays that she tries to help them out whenever she can and she performs with them some nights.
After hanging up with Vanessa, she calls Emilia back to forward the address. But she still tries to warn her about her. Emilia rolls her eyes, insisting she can handle her being extra hardcore about the business. Ruby still insists that she be careful. Saying how she'd blown up at her several times and doesn't like spending time with the other girls. "Just don't be surprised if she ends up breaking your heart. At the end of the day, she's the only one she really cares about."
Despite what just happened with Talia, how she spent the past year or so looking up to her only to have that image in her head smashed, Emilia remains optimistic. She truly believes Amber is different and wants to really get to know her since the other girls have clearly given up on that.
"Tickets" could very well be an inside joke. Amber dancing to this music because that's how others perceive her. They believe she's only concerned about herself and could care less about the people she hurts along the way.
However, this winds up not being the case. Amber is very warm with Emilia, looking very forward to working with her, while on the inside she's rejoicing because she knew there'd come a time that Emilia would tire of following Talia's lead [ergo the song "Told ya so" by Karmin].
All this being said, I have a couple of scenes to work on.
*Vanessa and Amber- "I have an idea and I want you to be part of it. And I hope Emilia will be too."
*Conversation with Amber and Talia- "You'll see. There will come a time when Emilia tries of following your lead and wants to join me."
*phone conversation involving Emilia, Ruby and Vanessa
*Emilia walking to the gritty side of town, taking in the surroundings, asking the local girls where the place is located and they tell her to watch out for Amber because she got one of their friends killed [and later, the conversation needs to happen where this is clarified]
*Amber's performance with Michel and Misha shortly before Emilia shows up.
Sunday, April 12, 2015
Javier and Evangeline- two new "Te Busque" characters
It'd been quite a while since my last entry and my last substantial bit of progress in this story.
But after having a couple of vivid dreams, I'd been inspired to continue.
Javier
Scarlet's love interest and future baby daddy
[Taylor Lautner- when I started writing his introductory scene, I kept stumbling across "Last December" lyrics, which Taylor Swift wrote about him]
[and with this latest season of figure skating in the books, I'd become so fond of Javier Fernandez that I was dying to use his name... but that's where the similarities end]
This idea originated from a dream. At first, I wrote a scene putting Talia in my shoes, as I was the one in the dream experiencing this. After putting it together, I realized that Talia had enough to deal with that I couldn't throw a pregnancy into it. Plus the maternal thing (aside from her relationship with Emilia, the need to protect her innocence) isn't really her style.
There was a split moment where I considered Emilia being Talia's daughter with her stepfather that she gave away for adoption... but have since thrown that idea away. It would just complicate things too much.
But for Scarlet, it fit better so I pursued it. Part of her backstory was that she got knocked up by her father during his last assault. Not soon after, her sister helped her escape. Within weeks of discovering this news, she miscarries. Despite how it was conceived, she still regrets the loss.
Unlike the other girls, Scarlet never found the strength to become part of the business. The part that involves sexual favors with the clients, closing deals for their employers. Ruby had been around it long enough (between dealing with their father and performing at his friend's strip club) that it doesn't bother her. She's willing to put herself in those situations to rake in the extra money to support them.
I'd been questioning a lot how much Scarlet will bring to the overall story. And I think I might have a few places where she can come in.
So I created another character for her to interact with. A love interest. I'm still working on the differentiation between him and Juan Paulo. But I see him being more tan, a year older than him, being slightly taller and with a little more muscle.
They first meet at karaoke night. After Talia performs and leaves, he catches up with her and asks when he can see her again. They exchange numbers and she gives him the address of their next gig. Not knowing that he and JP are friends. This interaction leads to JP appearing in the next musical number, which allows the plot to progress.
In turn, Scarlet starts to seeing Javier. The first serious relationship she'd had. [Now that I said that, I need to figure out the logistics of that... considering she'd been away from home for 10 years... is it because nobody's asked or because she hadn't been ready? Or had she been with a couple guys, but never to the point of intimacy? The latter sounds the most realistic and she can give a million excuses why she doesn't want sex... "I'm saving myself for marriage" could easily work a dozen times]
She talks to him about enjoying singing and sometimes liking it more than dancing. He encourages her to give it a shot because he was part of a band.
I hadn't thought much about their scenes together, so maybe I'll just mention them in conversation. Since this story focuses mostly on Talia and some on Amber.
But this does allow for a scene with her talking to Alejandro... which would be a perfect follow-up to the chapter where Vanessa learns about Amber is Carmen.
Around the time Talia breaks up with JP, Scarlet has sex with Javier. This is a big moment for her because her only sexual experiences were at the hands of her father.
And the experience is absolutely perfect for her. Javier has had plenty of experience and only recently decided to settle down and focus on finding a serious relationship that'd lead to marriage. The first moments, he makes sure she's comfortable and everything is okay because it sounds like she's crying in pain instead of joy.
The only thing that ruins the experience- when she falls asleep in her arms afterwards while she stays the night at his place- her nightmares come back. She explains to him as she's gathering her things about the full extent of her past, which he has no problem with, but she says that she needs a little time to think things over.
Amber, going through Emilia, recruits Scarlet to be part of her "House of Leather" theme night. I'd previously written that Scarlet gets the flu the night of the event and Ruby goes in her place. So I modified it a bit and gave her what she believes to be a stomach virus.
...yeah, it's cliché ... not to mention I've thought about how Javier wants to be more responsible, yet he doesn't think about protection.
I tried to write the scene a couple of times with her saying "It was spontaneous and romantic"... but no version of that ever made it into the scene.
Deep down, Scarlet's desire is to succeed in finding/maintaining a healthy relationship with the man she marries and having a family.
This new baby won't replace the one she lost, but it's an experience she's very grateful to have. And being a stand-up guy, Javier will be supportive.
The scene I wrote occurs after JP brings Emilia to Talia's. Scarlet calls on the doctor that helped her when she first arrived to help Emilia. She'd seen him regularly since then, both for medical reasons and also psychological. When she has concerns or deals with nightmares, he helps her.
She and Dr. Rodriguez have this intimate conversation, touching base on how things are going and he suggests seeing him if the stomach bug doesn't go away. I went further to have her talk to Alejandro as she's leaving to go to the drug store. He offers to come with her and she turns him down. Although I might change things up- not entirely sure if I want to play up how the two men are looking at her sympathetically... a way they hadn't looked at her since her arrival on the scene.
An unplanned pregnancy doesn't exactly make her a victim...
but it would make for a really good reconciliation scene between her and Carmen... she'll be the first person she tells the big news to.
Evangeline
[Juliet Simms' song of the same name could use a good visual...]
Another dream I had brought light to another part of Amber's past... the missing years between her leaving the club and her returning under another assumed name.
I had a dream about returning somewhere that I had spent a lot of time erasing from my memory... and despite the fact I'm not welcome back there in real life and I have negative feelings about it, I was allowed to return.
Carmen left the club for a number of reasons. But the biggest was Talia's transformation of it. The emphasis of the girls flaunting their sexuality in the dancing. It was a reminder of the world she was born into and she doesn't want to perpetuate the degree of sexuality. Her idea was just to entertain with Latin dancing and having fun putting on a show.
Ultimately, she felt there was nothing left for her to come back to, so she left. Scarlet had moved on from their friendship to new friends and she finally had her sister back. And Alejandro had eyes only for Talia, so she needed to get past that rejection as well.
I'm still figuring out Carmen's mindset when she returns there... I know I felt uneasy and under duress in my dream. Hopefully I'll be able to find a way to incorporate those feelings into the story because it is a tough decision for her to do.
Evangeline is a girl Carmen meets at her new waitressing gig- a bar with some pole dancing. She works there while Michel and Misha teach more dance classes and pursue the notion of buying a small venue to display their dancing. [It may very well become one in the same within the next 5-7 years]. She's got a lot of spunk and attitude, but can also be very sweet.
She's also among the hookers who operate in that part of town after hours. [The bar owner might also be their pimp, using the bar as a front for his business]. Many of them favor S&M and "50 Shades" types of deals. They sign contracts, never spend the night and leave their phone numbers for them the next morning.
Carmen is uneasy about this, opening up to Evangeline about all the things she went through growing up. She makes the world a little less intimidating for her, brings her along on a couple of her jobs, and starts to teach her some of the things she knows.
As far as her back story goes, her boyfriend [now the pimp/possible bar owner] won her trust with lavish gifts, convinced her to leave home with him and become part of his trade. So she doesn't necessarily feel threatened by it. Although he occasionally tells her to take the night off because he wants her all to himself.
In that particular case, he's the dominant and she's the submissive. But Carmen witnesses it a couple times [she moves in with her, given her meager share of the rent, she doesn't want to burden Michel & Misha] and remarks that it doesn't look consensual to her. Evangeline insists that he's done a lot for her and doesn't mind if he needs to blow off some steam during their "sessions."
This only lasts the first couple years Carmen is living there. [Somehow, she manages to keep Carmen's presence a secret from him because he insisted on her not having a roommate]. He starts sleeping around with other girls and leaves Evangeline to her regular duties. But as she starts to miss him, she finds another love interest and encounters some demons of her own. Namely, she discovers she has a greater attraction to women, which starts to take its toll on her. When she gets drunk, she crawls into bed with Carmen, kissing her and then crying in her arms.
The unfortunate conclusion is that Evangeline gets killed by her pimp boyfriend when he finds her in a bed with her girlfriend on a night when he had arranged several clients for her. Carmen returns from a late shift at work to find her dying in a pool of blood, and her dying words encourage her again to take her life back.
When she does make her way back to that side of town, she comes upon Talia running out on Alejandro. This gives her the extra boost that she needs, but remembering the way she left, she undergoes her drastic transformation.
Evangeline's biggest bit of advice while they were working was to never give their real name. [Her real name was Simone]. So she takes her "working" persona back with her. But instead of the wig, she gets highlights in her hair... that become permanent through a botched dying job.
This story arc of Carmen's takes place over the course of 5 years. She starts to build herself up again and starts to feel more in control of her life... but with everything that's happened, how much she opened up to Evangeline and lost her, she finds it even harder to be open with people. So she kinda adopts her attitude. Sarcastic with some cutthroat edge.
However, instead of being the dominant as she was with the johns she worked with in the line of duty, she becomes the submissive. Not just because she can't bring that part of herself to closed quarters anymore [mentally or sexually], but also to remind her of what she went through. What her mom went through. What Scarlet went through with her father. What Evangeline went through with her boyfriend. She needs that constant reminder that this life isn't okay, that it's hurt a lot of people she cares about.
I also have an idea that Amber has a pole dancing number that'll be inspired by Juliet Simms's "Evangeline," and she's someone she dedicates her dances to.
But on her first night with Ruby, she gets overshadowed by her pole dancing routine... unable to fully communicate to her why that upsets her.
Timeline-wise, I want Talia to be 29 when "Te Busque" begins... that's the factor that's affected some of my logistics. Particularly the length of time Carmen is away from the club. It also allows time for the girls to forget about her, so they're unable to recognize her.
I also figure that Amber needs to be a siren for four years before Emilia shows up... just for Talia to reach that age, and the two of them have a four year age difference.
The question is figuring when it was decided for Amber and Ruby to share a night, and how long they were doing so. Because Amber's attitude leaves her unwilling to work directly with Ruby and that can only go on for so long before it becomes a factor...
Talia appreciates Amber's artistry and attack, which allows her to forgive her attitude for some time. But there come a point where she starts to lose patience. Not sure why... maybe the fact Amber wants to work with Emilia, who she wants to protect her [and her innocence] from has her drawing that line. She respects her as a dancer [something she doesn't always admit], but loathes her attitude [which she is quick to call her on].
I also had an idea about Talia's back story, but that's another entry to itself. This one's running a little long as it is.
But after having a couple of vivid dreams, I'd been inspired to continue.
Javier
Scarlet's love interest and future baby daddy
[Taylor Lautner- when I started writing his introductory scene, I kept stumbling across "Last December" lyrics, which Taylor Swift wrote about him]
[and with this latest season of figure skating in the books, I'd become so fond of Javier Fernandez that I was dying to use his name... but that's where the similarities end]
This idea originated from a dream. At first, I wrote a scene putting Talia in my shoes, as I was the one in the dream experiencing this. After putting it together, I realized that Talia had enough to deal with that I couldn't throw a pregnancy into it. Plus the maternal thing (aside from her relationship with Emilia, the need to protect her innocence) isn't really her style.
There was a split moment where I considered Emilia being Talia's daughter with her stepfather that she gave away for adoption... but have since thrown that idea away. It would just complicate things too much.
But for Scarlet, it fit better so I pursued it. Part of her backstory was that she got knocked up by her father during his last assault. Not soon after, her sister helped her escape. Within weeks of discovering this news, she miscarries. Despite how it was conceived, she still regrets the loss.
Unlike the other girls, Scarlet never found the strength to become part of the business. The part that involves sexual favors with the clients, closing deals for their employers. Ruby had been around it long enough (between dealing with their father and performing at his friend's strip club) that it doesn't bother her. She's willing to put herself in those situations to rake in the extra money to support them.
I'd been questioning a lot how much Scarlet will bring to the overall story. And I think I might have a few places where she can come in.
So I created another character for her to interact with. A love interest. I'm still working on the differentiation between him and Juan Paulo. But I see him being more tan, a year older than him, being slightly taller and with a little more muscle.
They first meet at karaoke night. After Talia performs and leaves, he catches up with her and asks when he can see her again. They exchange numbers and she gives him the address of their next gig. Not knowing that he and JP are friends. This interaction leads to JP appearing in the next musical number, which allows the plot to progress.
In turn, Scarlet starts to seeing Javier. The first serious relationship she'd had. [Now that I said that, I need to figure out the logistics of that... considering she'd been away from home for 10 years... is it because nobody's asked or because she hadn't been ready? Or had she been with a couple guys, but never to the point of intimacy? The latter sounds the most realistic and she can give a million excuses why she doesn't want sex... "I'm saving myself for marriage" could easily work a dozen times]
She talks to him about enjoying singing and sometimes liking it more than dancing. He encourages her to give it a shot because he was part of a band.
I hadn't thought much about their scenes together, so maybe I'll just mention them in conversation. Since this story focuses mostly on Talia and some on Amber.
But this does allow for a scene with her talking to Alejandro... which would be a perfect follow-up to the chapter where Vanessa learns about Amber is Carmen.
Around the time Talia breaks up with JP, Scarlet has sex with Javier. This is a big moment for her because her only sexual experiences were at the hands of her father.
And the experience is absolutely perfect for her. Javier has had plenty of experience and only recently decided to settle down and focus on finding a serious relationship that'd lead to marriage. The first moments, he makes sure she's comfortable and everything is okay because it sounds like she's crying in pain instead of joy.
The only thing that ruins the experience- when she falls asleep in her arms afterwards while she stays the night at his place- her nightmares come back. She explains to him as she's gathering her things about the full extent of her past, which he has no problem with, but she says that she needs a little time to think things over.
Amber, going through Emilia, recruits Scarlet to be part of her "House of Leather" theme night. I'd previously written that Scarlet gets the flu the night of the event and Ruby goes in her place. So I modified it a bit and gave her what she believes to be a stomach virus.
...yeah, it's cliché ... not to mention I've thought about how Javier wants to be more responsible, yet he doesn't think about protection.
I tried to write the scene a couple of times with her saying "It was spontaneous and romantic"... but no version of that ever made it into the scene.
Deep down, Scarlet's desire is to succeed in finding/maintaining a healthy relationship with the man she marries and having a family.
This new baby won't replace the one she lost, but it's an experience she's very grateful to have. And being a stand-up guy, Javier will be supportive.
The scene I wrote occurs after JP brings Emilia to Talia's. Scarlet calls on the doctor that helped her when she first arrived to help Emilia. She'd seen him regularly since then, both for medical reasons and also psychological. When she has concerns or deals with nightmares, he helps her.
She and Dr. Rodriguez have this intimate conversation, touching base on how things are going and he suggests seeing him if the stomach bug doesn't go away. I went further to have her talk to Alejandro as she's leaving to go to the drug store. He offers to come with her and she turns him down. Although I might change things up- not entirely sure if I want to play up how the two men are looking at her sympathetically... a way they hadn't looked at her since her arrival on the scene.
An unplanned pregnancy doesn't exactly make her a victim...
but it would make for a really good reconciliation scene between her and Carmen... she'll be the first person she tells the big news to.
Evangeline
[Juliet Simms' song of the same name could use a good visual...]
Another dream I had brought light to another part of Amber's past... the missing years between her leaving the club and her returning under another assumed name.
I had a dream about returning somewhere that I had spent a lot of time erasing from my memory... and despite the fact I'm not welcome back there in real life and I have negative feelings about it, I was allowed to return.
Carmen left the club for a number of reasons. But the biggest was Talia's transformation of it. The emphasis of the girls flaunting their sexuality in the dancing. It was a reminder of the world she was born into and she doesn't want to perpetuate the degree of sexuality. Her idea was just to entertain with Latin dancing and having fun putting on a show.
Ultimately, she felt there was nothing left for her to come back to, so she left. Scarlet had moved on from their friendship to new friends and she finally had her sister back. And Alejandro had eyes only for Talia, so she needed to get past that rejection as well.
I'm still figuring out Carmen's mindset when she returns there... I know I felt uneasy and under duress in my dream. Hopefully I'll be able to find a way to incorporate those feelings into the story because it is a tough decision for her to do.
Evangeline is a girl Carmen meets at her new waitressing gig- a bar with some pole dancing. She works there while Michel and Misha teach more dance classes and pursue the notion of buying a small venue to display their dancing. [It may very well become one in the same within the next 5-7 years]. She's got a lot of spunk and attitude, but can also be very sweet.
She's also among the hookers who operate in that part of town after hours. [The bar owner might also be their pimp, using the bar as a front for his business]. Many of them favor S&M and "50 Shades" types of deals. They sign contracts, never spend the night and leave their phone numbers for them the next morning.
Carmen is uneasy about this, opening up to Evangeline about all the things she went through growing up. She makes the world a little less intimidating for her, brings her along on a couple of her jobs, and starts to teach her some of the things she knows.
As far as her back story goes, her boyfriend [now the pimp/possible bar owner] won her trust with lavish gifts, convinced her to leave home with him and become part of his trade. So she doesn't necessarily feel threatened by it. Although he occasionally tells her to take the night off because he wants her all to himself.
In that particular case, he's the dominant and she's the submissive. But Carmen witnesses it a couple times [she moves in with her, given her meager share of the rent, she doesn't want to burden Michel & Misha] and remarks that it doesn't look consensual to her. Evangeline insists that he's done a lot for her and doesn't mind if he needs to blow off some steam during their "sessions."
This only lasts the first couple years Carmen is living there. [Somehow, she manages to keep Carmen's presence a secret from him because he insisted on her not having a roommate]. He starts sleeping around with other girls and leaves Evangeline to her regular duties. But as she starts to miss him, she finds another love interest and encounters some demons of her own. Namely, she discovers she has a greater attraction to women, which starts to take its toll on her. When she gets drunk, she crawls into bed with Carmen, kissing her and then crying in her arms.
The unfortunate conclusion is that Evangeline gets killed by her pimp boyfriend when he finds her in a bed with her girlfriend on a night when he had arranged several clients for her. Carmen returns from a late shift at work to find her dying in a pool of blood, and her dying words encourage her again to take her life back.
When she does make her way back to that side of town, she comes upon Talia running out on Alejandro. This gives her the extra boost that she needs, but remembering the way she left, she undergoes her drastic transformation.
Evangeline's biggest bit of advice while they were working was to never give their real name. [Her real name was Simone]. So she takes her "working" persona back with her. But instead of the wig, she gets highlights in her hair... that become permanent through a botched dying job.
This story arc of Carmen's takes place over the course of 5 years. She starts to build herself up again and starts to feel more in control of her life... but with everything that's happened, how much she opened up to Evangeline and lost her, she finds it even harder to be open with people. So she kinda adopts her attitude. Sarcastic with some cutthroat edge.
However, instead of being the dominant as she was with the johns she worked with in the line of duty, she becomes the submissive. Not just because she can't bring that part of herself to closed quarters anymore [mentally or sexually], but also to remind her of what she went through. What her mom went through. What Scarlet went through with her father. What Evangeline went through with her boyfriend. She needs that constant reminder that this life isn't okay, that it's hurt a lot of people she cares about.
I also have an idea that Amber has a pole dancing number that'll be inspired by Juliet Simms's "Evangeline," and she's someone she dedicates her dances to.
But on her first night with Ruby, she gets overshadowed by her pole dancing routine... unable to fully communicate to her why that upsets her.
Timeline-wise, I want Talia to be 29 when "Te Busque" begins... that's the factor that's affected some of my logistics. Particularly the length of time Carmen is away from the club. It also allows time for the girls to forget about her, so they're unable to recognize her.
I also figure that Amber needs to be a siren for four years before Emilia shows up... just for Talia to reach that age, and the two of them have a four year age difference.
The question is figuring when it was decided for Amber and Ruby to share a night, and how long they were doing so. Because Amber's attitude leaves her unwilling to work directly with Ruby and that can only go on for so long before it becomes a factor...
Talia appreciates Amber's artistry and attack, which allows her to forgive her attitude for some time. But there come a point where she starts to lose patience. Not sure why... maybe the fact Amber wants to work with Emilia, who she wants to protect her [and her innocence] from has her drawing that line. She respects her as a dancer [something she doesn't always admit], but loathes her attitude [which she is quick to call her on].
I also had an idea about Talia's back story, but that's another entry to itself. This one's running a little long as it is.
Saturday, April 11, 2015
Talia's Playlist- A Work in Progress- Te Busque
It was a sunny Friday afternoon at the shorehouse. For the heck of it, I decided to take out my iPod and see if I could, hypothetically, put together a storyline of songs for Talia.
After all, "Te Busque" did begin with her. I'd spent so much time lately with my supporting characters (getting bigger roles all the time) that I wanted to be sure I didn't leave her out of the loop entirely.
I realized 20 something songs later that I have maybe 85% of my story figured out by now. I have my motivation for all my characters. I know their backstories pretty well. (Vanessa's the only wildcard I still have because the darkest thing in her past was a possessive/controlling boyfriend she was only together with for a short time... unless I draw it more, then I might be set, actually).
My go-to source of inspiration for her and the main storyline is Nelly Furtado's "Loose" album. Not surprisingly, it makes up the majority of my playlist.
The only track I didn't play was "Maneater" because it's a flashback sequence. Going back to when Alejandro first laid eyes on Talia and begin his quest to have her as his girlfriend.
And later on (the next day) I remembered I wanted to include "Outta my Head" by Daughtry as part of JP's mental dialogue. It's just a matter of placement.
That day I also realized that "Marry the Night" by Lady Gaga could be a great finale group number. Since that song is all about embracing your flaws just as much as your better qualities, it could be a good indication of her new direction that moves beyond straight up sex appeal.
It feels like whenever male song choices come up, they're companion pieces to songs that fit Talia's current mindset. So I figure that Daughtry track would fit really well: JP being lovestruck while Talia is mocking the notion of love.
"Mannequin," however strange it comes off, does not deter him and he can only think how Talia is an "Extraordinary girl"
Then it fits that after they say their goodbyes when Talia breaks things off, JP will wander about looking Talia, having not seen her since she broke up with him and can't seem to move on.
Two huge questions remain that my album collection can't seem to answer at this point:
1) Scarlet and Vanessa use "Telephone" to try to distract Talia from her guy troubles and to make her feel better. I picture it starting to work, but something sets her off and she leaves them... need to figure out what that is
2) What else other than JP saying he will wait forever for her convinces Talia to give him a chance? Further, what information about her is exchanged between him and Vanessa? on their "date" that she sets up to check him out for Talia and give an opinion.
After all, "Te Busque" did begin with her. I'd spent so much time lately with my supporting characters (getting bigger roles all the time) that I wanted to be sure I didn't leave her out of the loop entirely.
I realized 20 something songs later that I have maybe 85% of my story figured out by now. I have my motivation for all my characters. I know their backstories pretty well. (Vanessa's the only wildcard I still have because the darkest thing in her past was a possessive/controlling boyfriend she was only together with for a short time... unless I draw it more, then I might be set, actually).
My go-to source of inspiration for her and the main storyline is Nelly Furtado's "Loose" album. Not surprisingly, it makes up the majority of my playlist.
The only track I didn't play was "Maneater" because it's a flashback sequence. Going back to when Alejandro first laid eyes on Talia and begin his quest to have her as his girlfriend.
And later on (the next day) I remembered I wanted to include "Outta my Head" by Daughtry as part of JP's mental dialogue. It's just a matter of placement.
That day I also realized that "Marry the Night" by Lady Gaga could be a great finale group number. Since that song is all about embracing your flaws just as much as your better qualities, it could be a good indication of her new direction that moves beyond straight up sex appeal.
- [act 1] Afraid- NF
- Showtime- NF
- Promiscuous- NF
- Oops... I did it again- Britney Spears~
- Outta My Head- Daughtry
- No Hay Iqual- NF
- Mannequin- Britney Spears
- Extraordinary Girl- Green Day [end act 1]
- [act 2] Telephone- Lady Gaga
- Te Busque- NF
- Dance in the Dark- Gaga
- I like it Rough- Gaga~
- Paper Gangsta- Gaga
- Wait for you- NF
- Say it right- NF
- Do it- NF
- All good things come to an end- NF [end act 2]
- [act 3] Whatshername- Green Day
- Monster- Gaga
- Alejandro- Gaga
- Bad Romance- Gaga~
- Princess of China- Coldplay w/Rihanna
- Te Busque (reprise) [end act 3]
- [epilogue] Marry the Night- Gaga
It feels like whenever male song choices come up, they're companion pieces to songs that fit Talia's current mindset. So I figure that Daughtry track would fit really well: JP being lovestruck while Talia is mocking the notion of love.
"Mannequin," however strange it comes off, does not deter him and he can only think how Talia is an "Extraordinary girl"
Then it fits that after they say their goodbyes when Talia breaks things off, JP will wander about looking Talia, having not seen her since she broke up with him and can't seem to move on.
Two huge questions remain that my album collection can't seem to answer at this point:
1) Scarlet and Vanessa use "Telephone" to try to distract Talia from her guy troubles and to make her feel better. I picture it starting to work, but something sets her off and she leaves them... need to figure out what that is
2) What else other than JP saying he will wait forever for her convinces Talia to give him a chance? Further, what information about her is exchanged between him and Vanessa? on their "date" that she sets up to check him out for Talia and give an opinion.
Tuesday, December 9, 2014
Character Sketch: Meet Amber
**Two big question marks still remain, but I think I finally have enough information to finally start sharing.**
At least for this particular character
For two years now, I've been brainstorming for a book. It's about a group of dancers [dubbed "sirens"] who are the star attraction at a club. They put together elaborate routines [to songs by strong female artists] in the style of Latin dance with an emphasis on flaunting their sexuality.
The venue was previously a restaurant owned by a mob family who work in the drug trade. So occasionally, they ask the girls to close the place to the public. In the case where negotiations are at an impasse, a couple of the girls offer their unique "services," which helps close the deal.
...as of this point, I'm still figuring out the location... my gut says somewhere in South America, particularly a place where prostitution is legal.
It's a place with so few opportunities that often times, there's no other choice but to go this route.
Fair warning: my girls have all experienced abuse in one capacity or another.
So discretion is advised.
Carmen "Amber" Garcia
(likeness in hair color only)
Birthday: August 21st (Leo)
Eyes: Brown
Hair: Dark with bangs and auburn highlights
Build: Bombshell
Bust size: C-cup
Back story:
Carmen- age 0-14
Carmen's mother, Amber, ran away from home when she was 14. After which, she was abducted and forced into a prostitution ring. Each apartment in the brothel has two bedrooms. One for living quarters and one for business.
One of her clients knocked her up at age 18. She raised Carmen in bedroom living quarters, keeping her hidden from her bosses. But as years progresses, depression began to take a hold of her. She overdosed on pills when Carmen was only 10. One of her captors found the body, comforted Carmen and then sexually assaulted her.
"I screamed for help but no one came... nobody answers screams in this place."
Her body developed early, so she was popular among this particular type of cliental. The common scenario involved her hands being tied or handcuffed to the bed, as if she had tried to escape multiple times. In fact, there was no chance of escape since the door was always locked and the windows were too high to jump from.
At age 14, a friendship formed between her and one of her clients. He quickly became a regular and spent his "paid time" having commonplace conversations with her. He even helped her learn how to read and write, something her mother barely had time to teach her, between her work and the crippling depression.
He concocted a plan to fake her death and he gave her transport out of the facility to a couple towns over.
Question #1: I still don't know who he was or what happened to him. I wrote that he said he'd come back for her. And if he never came, he recommended a place to go for help.
That place just happens to be owned by the mob family.
Carmen- age 14-18
Because of her bombshell figure, Carmen passed herself off as age 16 rather than 14 to get work and to find an apartment.
At the mob-owned restaurant, she was a waitress. She quickly became infatuated with Alejandro. He was the nephew of the owners and heir apparent of the restaurant. He was also a womanizer. They fostered a friendship and she waited through dozens of one-night-stands for him to take notice her. That, plus the fact she was waiting until she was officially 18 to come forward about her feelings.
She lived in an apartment with two co-workers, Michel and Misha, who taught her how to dance. In their spare time, they taught Latin styles like Cha-cha and samba.
Future siren, Scarlet, arrived a year after Carmen. Her twin sister Ruby had helped her escape their abusive father. Carmen supports her throughout this recovery progress, which involves physical and mental repercussions. The two become best friends.
Unbeknownst to either of them, the restaurant had been falling on hard times, financially. The whole neighborhood has experienced similar hardships.
Around this pivotal time, my story's protagonist Talia arrives on the scene. Her idea is to transform the restaurant into a club that features all female personnel. Bartenders and dancers. For her own personal reasons, she also offers to prostitute herself to help with their business negotiations. Her childhood friend Vanessa comes along shortly after.
For a number of reasons, Carmen develops a strong hostility towards Talia. She changed her workplace so drastically in a short time (during which she was out sick). She was ready to come to Alejandro about her feelings and he's smitten with Talia. Scarlet also starts spending more time with her, so she feels as if she's lost her best friend.
Then there's the fact Talia's style of dancing is overtly sexual. Given the world she came from, it's like her past has returned to haunt her.
Talia, Vanessa and Scarlet form the dance troupe who call themselves "sirens" as they use their dancing to draw in their audience. Auditions are held to find another member of their troupe. Carmen decides to do so, with Michel and Misha as back-up.
[Inspiration: "Just Dance" by Lady Gaga]
Things do not go well. Not only does Talia say her heart isn't in the dance (Carmen takes this to mean she wasn't sexy enough for her tastes), but she also fires Michel and Misha to promote her vision of an all-female cast. To add insult to injury, Ruby is among the auditionees. She and her friends adapt a routine from their previous place of employment, a strip club.
[Inspiration: "Love Game" by Lady Gaga]
With everything going wrong, Carmen decides that the best thing to do is leave.
Amber- age ?-present
Question #2: What happens to her in the time period she was away from the club? How long was she away?
With no opportunities, and no desire to leave Alejandro behind, Carmen has no choice but to return to the club. But in order to become the very thing she opposed, she assumes a new identity.
She dubs herself "Amber," paying homage to her mother and the new highlights in her hair (which have become permanent after a botched dying job). She also grows bangs, puts on more make-up, and (possibly) gets some piercings.
She succeeds at her first audition.
[inspiration: "Circus" by Britney Spears]
Talia only suggests that she put on less make-up next time.
Amber and Talia are similar in that both girls don't like talking about their pasts. But Amber is more aloof. She keeps her distance from Scarlet so she doesn't see through her façade. She has a caustic attitude around Ruby. The two of them share two nights every work week, but she keeps her distance from her. She never forgave her for the audition where she overshadowed her and remains paranoid that will one day happen again.
And of course, she has a great deal of disdain and hostility towards Talia. She desires to step outside of the same old routines, wanting to introduce hip-hop, but Talia refuses.
And while she has the final say on the playlists everyone uses for their routines, once or twice, Talia has stolen one of Amber's songs [most of them are from Britney Spears' "Circus" album] to dissuade men pursing her.
Emilia, the newest girl employed by the club (specifically as a back-up dancer), becomes another big part of this storyline of conflict.
Originally, auditions were held to find another dancer to perform with Amber and Ruby. Something they needed pretty desperately because Amber refused to work with her.
But her audition impresses her so much that she doesn't want Amber to get a hold of her.
As part of her new persona, Amber takes things a few steps further than the other girls.
Only she, Talia and Ruby are involved in the "extracurricular" activities.
Amber is into a lot of bondage (and later on adds blindfolds). The others believe she does this for shock value or because it's something she's really into... but after her past experiences, this is the only way she can perform sexually.
Amber wants to work with Emilia, but Talia won't allow it unless she agrees to work with some of the other sirens.
Working with Vanessa is the beginning of this, which isn't a difficult concession to make since the two are good friends.
While Talia's storyline progresses, fending off another suitor and later falling in love with him, Amber brews an idea for a theme night called "House of Leather" which extends to their wardrobe.
[Inspired by a series of songs from Lady Gaga's "Born this way" album]
Emilia agrees to help her out after finding about the true nature of their business (something Talia deliberately kept from her to protect her innocence).
The only problem that arises is that Ruby shows up instead of Scarlet and upstages Amber.
Other Comments
When I originally constructed Amber, she was nothing more than an opposing force for Talia to contend with. A rival who wanted to be the #1 girl on the roster.
But as I started writing the back story, I found that there was so much more to her.
She's probably THE moral compass of the story, the one who wants to give up this lifestyle and do something more constructive.
And in the end, it's all about getting Alejandro to notice her.
Eventually her secrets do come out, but they help everyone get closer together. And Talia decides to move their business away from selling sex and allowing the other girls to contribute more than she'd allowed in the past.
She even asks Amber to teach her some hip-hop, something she'd become quite good at.
Personally, of all the girls, I probably have the most in common with Amber. Certainly in the early part of her character arc (before the name change), the unrequited love and harboring feelings for a guy is something I've experienced. She's fiercely loyal to her friends and those she loves. She has trouble expressing herself and what she really wants. Granted, she's probably much braver than I am in certain situations.
Celebrity look-alikes/inspirations
Apollonia (bombshell figure and complexion)
Vanity (middle- animalistic attitude on stage)
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